Evil Commentary Bureau: [Haruhi] Haruhi Suzumiya: SOS Brigade's Greastest Actor

[Brian]

And here, something that revived the ECB from nearly a decade of slumber.  We cannot e-mail the poster, nor can we send him the entire review through the ff.net messaging system, unfortunately, so here for the perusal of all, is the fruit of our effort -- a product that took an extensive team nearly two weeks to assemble.

Within:  The ECB vs. Creepy Wish Fulfillment Author.

http://soulriders.org/brian/ECB/greastestecb01.html
http://soulriders.org/brian/ECB/greastestecb02.html
http://soulriders.org/brian/ECB/greastestecb03.html
http://soulriders.org/brian/ECB/greastestecb04.html
http://soulriders.org/brian/ECB/greastestecb05.html

The author has been notified:

http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8374549/0/1/

Tragically, the site name was eaten by ff.net shenanigans.  A pity, really.  We will have to hope the author can find us anyway.

Edit: Making this visible to guests as well as members.  Oops!

[VySaika]

Thoughts as I go:

Chapter 1: Dear god, this thing is awful. It's a very strange thing to read, since I enjoy the ECB sections...but the fic sections are terrible, so my brain keeps trying to skim over it to read the ECB parts without context. The bit at the end about him being mad that he had to do this chapter was kinda ??? though. really no idea what he meant by that.

Chapter 2: I can safely call this fic the worst thing I've ever read. And to put that in perspective, I read some *pokemon porn stories* a freind of mine found back in HS on a dare. And as awful as those were, I am confident to say that they are *objectively better written* then this. I don't know whether to hope this writer is just a kid still, so it almost excuses the utter shit writing(almost. Actually no not even then, but), or that he's an adult so that he so truely deserves the reaming the ECB is supplying here. And on that note "I could eat alphabet soup and SHIT a better sentance then that!" nearly made me choke laughing.

Chapter 3: Why does this chapter even exist? It's like...I have no idea. Stuff happens, logic has no place in this world and nothing makes even the remotest bit of sense. I'm still kinda reeling from the sheer nonsensicalness of it all. It's too "huh?" inducing to even be offensive, I have to be able to make at least some sense of something in order to be offended by it. Though one thing near the end stands out to me. His promise of "kyon beatings" I am....beginning to doubt he means "kyon bashings" and instead that he really means that kyon is going to have the piss beaten out of him. Prolly by one of his oh-so-kewl retarded spies from Nyancat five(The five Is Lowercase). We'll see I guess.

Chapter 4:

[Dracos]

I honestly think that the first chapter didn't originally exist.  That he showed it to someone and they went 'wot?'.

Hum...I should start reading the final result :P

[Dracos]

Tyler is a Good Boy.

[Dracos]

Hmm.

Several spots in the ECB got mangled in the save as text :\.  Not sure what can be done there, as it's just things that aren't ascii.

[alethiophile]

The issue is that browsers, by and large, refuse to submit text files to ordinary encoding detection, and instead just use default encoding. Which, for some stupid reason, appears to be non-sane ISO-8859-1, rather than sane UTF-8. Could recode the ECB as HTML, if needed; that would fix it.

[Arakawa]

The issue is that browsers, by and large, refuse to submit text files to ordinary encoding detection, and instead just use default encoding. Which, for some stupid reason, appears to be non-sane ISO-8859-1, rather than sane UTF-8. Could recode the ECB as HTML, if needed; that would fix it.

Something like that could probably help. At least, I'm hoping you could fix the one line where Kyuubey says "This is !@#$ up, even by my standards!". The Kyuubey face gets turned into gibberish, and it's right after a long rant I had, which makes it look (in context) that I'm saying that my standards are about the same as Kyuubey's.

Which isn't true... hopefully?

[Brian]

Right -- HTML version uploaded; thanks to Alethiophile for doing the work of getting it set up.

[Grahf]

Even with the excellent commentary that was very hard to read all the way through. Some of the errors were just awful, to say nothing of the actual plot of this train-wreck.

For some reason I think that whoever wrote this isn't even a fan of Haruhi. The fact that the other people that he put in his anti-nakama seem to be named after his real life friends makes me believe that perhaps one of his firends might have picked up the series, and that he wrote this to try to impress them. Granted that doesn't make it any less terrible, but still.

One thing (among many) that bothered me but that didn't get touched upon by you guys: aside from having a spelling error, does the title even make any sense? In retrospect it does, if only because Haruhi would have to be a great actress in order to make her brain damage seem so natural. I'm more willing to believe you guys that the actual cast jumped ship at first possible opportunity, if only because it means that I need less brain bleach at the end of the day.

[Xsen]

I thought the title referred to Kyon being The Male's enemies' friend all the way through the fic... :)

[Kt3]

@Grahf: I think I commented about the title in Ch. 1, not sure if it made the revisions however.