043. "You keep saying 'it'. Isn't it a boy or a girl?"

[Corwin]

#ed

[20:05] <Kotono> Later that day you catch up to Sylvie and Yuria. The former slumps down into a chair, upstairs at Whimsical Sweets. Yuria's near her, "So like," she goes on as Sylvie rests, "If we have that, then...oh hi, Aaeru!"
[20:06] <Aaeru> "Heya!"
[20:06] <Kotono> "Like, can you believe it?" Yuria comes over, "We have a map now, and we didn't even have to pay for it! It's like money from heaven, except it doesn't hit you on the head!"
[20:07] <Kotono> Sylvie makes an incoherent noise, rubbing the bridge of her nose.
[20:08] <Aaeru> "So, like, let me guess?" Aaeru ventures, since it seems that turn of events is pretty clear. "Josa went back to that shop and, like, talked at them until they gave up the map for free?"
[20:10] <Kotono> "Well, Sylvie copied it down and, like, Josa came and talked to Dacote, then they went back and talked some more in private!" Yuria says cheerfully, "And now we have a map!"
[20:11] <Aaeru> "If he talked about it then it's okay," Aaeru accepts, shrugging. "So, like, where does it lead?"
[20:12] <Kotono> "Essentially," Sylvie speaks up, going on, "It looks to point to a cove on the coast of the Barbarian Lands. It could be a gnome ruin, Janson has said they pepper the area."
[20:12] <Aaeru> "Hey, if it's a cove, I bet Neve would love to see it!" Aaeru perks up. "When are you going?"
[20:14] <Kotono> "We're going to wait for the others to get back," Sylvie looks up, "I just happened to have studied that damned scroll the day before, it was chilling how amazing a coincidence it was. It's called a Scroll of Riches. If you know the right words, it becomes a treasure map, showing you the way to riches. The catch is that there's no guarantee the riches are safe or unguarded."
[20:16] * Aaeru can't disguise the loss of some of her interest at 'riches'. "I'll totally be there to protect everyone, then!" she decides after a moment's contemplation.
[20:17] <Kotono> "Like, I can go," Yuria says, "But as long as those damn dirty dwarves don't!" Shivering, "I don't want to become a dwarf! Like Aaeru, did you know that dwarves are totally contagious?"
[20:18] <Kotono> At this Sylvie hides a snicker, hand going to her mouth.
[20:18] <Aaeru> "Ah--" Aaeru furrows her brows, before glancing at Sylvie for salvation. "Silver?" she wonders out loud, since that's the explanation that makes the most sense.
[20:19] <Kotono> "Uh huh," Sylvie says with a chuckle.
[20:20] <Aaeru> "Well, like, I never heard that it was, like, contagious!" Aaeru tells Yuria. "But if they're dirty we so totally have to help them! We have to teach them to wash their face and their hands and maybe even, like, teach them the cleaning spell!"
[20:21] <Kotono> "Right!" As Sylvie groans, Yuria goes on, "We totally have to clean them up so they aren't contagious! I mean, do we like all want to become dwarves?"
[20:22] <Aaeru> "You know, maybe you can become something else after all," Aaeru muses. "Like, people turn into dragons all the time, right? And into fey! And, umm, angels and stuff! Maybe sometimes it really can be, like, contagious!"
[20:22] <Kotono> "Oh wow," Yuria says, "I mean, do you want to become a dwarf, Aaeru?"
[20:22] <Aaeru> "Well no," Aaeru admits. "But, like, a fey is fine, I kinda think?"
[20:23] <Kotono> "Well, maybe if I study a lot of rocks..." Yuria mutters as she thinks, "A fey is like a fairy, right? Like Silver?"
[20:24] <Aaeru> "That's a bad fey," Aaeru says, grimacing. "If I, like, become a fey I want to be a good fey like Neve!"
[20:25] <Kotono> "Right," Yuria says, "Though speaking of, does that whole girl's love thing spread too? I mean, if I went and made out with you, and I totally wouldn't since you're not my type, would I become like a half lesbian? A demi-lesbian?" Frowning as she thinks about it, "All of this is getting really confusing! It's like you can totally change!"
[20:27] <Aaeru> "It really doesn't, I don't think," Aaeru responds. "Like, it's just dumb. And why would seafood be there anyway? But yeah, like, even if we made out I'm sure you'll still be you. But we won't because I don't like you that way."
[20:28] <Kotono> "You can't..." Sylvie starts, before slumping deeper into her chair, almost to the point of sliding out. "Why, Oghma?"
[20:29] <Kotono> "I think it's dumb too, but then everyone starts talking about becoming a dragon of a fairy and I start wondering," Yuria says, "I mean, I did always wonder how girls ended up like that, you know? It's so strange! Why would the heroes of the Baronies end up like that unless it was wrong? I mean, it was bad enough they ruined imperial, like, authority!"
[20:31] <Aaeru> "I dunno." Aaeru shrugs. "I guess it's because, like, there was this girl and she was interesting? I bet it's like that. Did you ever look at some guy and just, like, really liked him right away?"
[20:32] <Kotono> "Oh sure," Yuria giggles, "I've seen a few I really like! I even have one right now!"
[20:33] <Aaeru> "Is he evil? Because it always seems like there's something wrong with interesting guys! Like, there's Janson, but he's like this exception but he grew up in this village of women so they all rubbed off on him or something."
[20:37] <Kotono> "Oh no, which is the bad part!" Lowering her voice, "I sorta like him, but I totally don't want to become ad warf, even if he's cute! I love that beard and that axe he carries around, it reminds me a little bit of General Olburt! He was totally cute before he vanished, I, like, saw a painting of him in Malmuth!"
[20:38] <Aaeru> "Oh!" Aaeru suddenly gets it. "But, like, if he's so short, wouldn't everything be?" she asks Yuria, leaning over and lowering her voice considerably.
[20:39] <Kotono> "You know, I thought about that too!" Yuria nods along, "But if he's cute I bet he's the exception, since he's like totally manly!"
[20:40] <Aaeru> "You know, I have this spell that makes me large?" Aaeru says enthusiastically. "If you need help, like, tell me right away! I'll teach you how to cast that!"
[20:41] <Kotono> "Oh sure!" Yuria says and giggles, "Totally!"
[20:42] <Aaeru> "Awesome!" Aaeru giggles happily herself. "I hope you'll be, like, really happy!"
[20:43] <Kotono> "Right! I'm gonna ask him out then,"Yuria says, "I'll just have to ask him not to infect me and use magic on him first!"
[20:44] <Aaeru> "Ooh! Want me to watch you? Then you don't even need to ask! If I see, like, something strange, I'll let you know!"
[20:46] <Kotono> "Sure!" Yuria nods along, "I bet it'll totally goes well as long as he's willing to date humans!"
[20:47] <Aaeru> "And washes all the time!"
[20:48] <Kotono> "Right! If not that's why King Ferdi invented cleaning magic!" Yuria nods quickly.
[20:49] <Aaeru> "You know, I wonder if there's more cleaning magic that I don't know about at all," Aaeru muses. "Hey Sylvie, what do you think?"
[20:51] <Kotono> Sylvie sits up, running a hand through her hair, "Maybe." Pausing to rub her face, "What do you think?"
[20:52] <Aaeru> "Well, there's the normal spell that cleans you up and makes you smell lots better! And there's this spell that fixes clothing if you tear it a bit, but it can't really do lots more? And I know there's better spells for that, so maybe there's better spells for cleaning, too?"

[Corwin]

#d

[20:45] <Kotono> Your return is a pleasant one. You find Silver sitting inside, the shop empty today. She's using a tiny nailfile, working on her nails. Without looking up, "Sorry, we're closed today. Josa's all mopey because his butt looks big in his robes again, so he's off cutting himself."
[20:46] <Janson> "That's great but we work here," Janson replies blandly. "Anyone else around?"
[20:46] * Orval blinks. "He's what?"
[20:47] <Kotono> "Oh hey guys," Looking up and waving a hand, "Nah, he's working on a new confection or something. Whatever. Anyway, the girls are upstairs."
[20:51] <Janson> "Right, we'll go see how they're doing," Janson replies, dismissing the fairy afterwards and heading up.
[20:52] * Orval eyes the fairy strangely as he heads upstairs.

[Corwin]

[20:53] <Kotono> As the trio talk, footsteps come up the stairs. Janson, Orval and Whurric all trudge up! Yuria turns away from Aaeru, "Oh hi, you guys are back! How'd it go?"
[20:53] <Kotono> Sylvie perks up, looking right to Janson with tired, bloodshot eyes.
[20:53] <Whurric> "Badly, lass. Badly," Whurric answers.
[20:53] <Aaeru> "Janson!" Aaery exclaims, standing up with a smile.
[20:54] <Janson> "Our customer got killed in an orgy with about thirty succubi," Janson replies, heading over to Sylvie. "Naturally I didn't participate, but I can't speak for Orval," he leans down to give her a quick kiss.
[20:54] <Kotono> "Too bad," Yuria goes over to Whurric and smiles, "Say, how about I make it better for you now? Want to, like, go out for dinner?"
[20:54] * Aaeru freezes in place. "Uhh...."
[20:55] <Kotono> That gets Sylvie to stop and bilnk. She gives Janson a totally stunned look, "Um...what?"
[20:56] <Aaeru> "Hey!" Aaeru exclaims, pointing at Orval.
[20:56] <Janson> "Yeah, disguised as nymphs and everything - that actually scared me more than enticed me, but bad luck for them," Janson straightens up, seeing he won't get a welcome home kiss after all. "Then we acted as bait to help some powerful daughters of Jannath lay waste to the succubi. Was pretty intense. Also our customer turned into a wight and tried to kill us while we were dragging the body
[20:56] <Janson> away after the orgy."
[20:56] <Orval> "Aye, I'm ashamed to admit that it's true. Me brother and Janson kept clear heads while our clients fell under their supernatural wiles. They were able to save me when I snapped out of it, but it was too late for our client."
[20:56] * Whurric blinks at Yuria's question. "Uuh, sure, I guess that'd be nice?" he finally says though he turns to look at Aaeru, not recognizing her from the others.
[20:56] * Orval looks at Aaeru. "Yes?"
[20:57] <Kotono> "At least you're safe..." Sylvie mutters, looking up to Janson. "Whew."
[20:57] <Aaeru> "But they're, like, demons! Evil and horrible! How could you do that?!"
[20:57] <Orval> "They appeared as nymphs."
[20:57] <Kotono> Smiling to Whurric, "Great! You're clean so you won't turn me into a dwarf, right, Whurric?"
[20:57] <Janson> "While not quite as good looking as any of you three," Janson squeezes Sylvie's shoulder, "They were really pretty. But yeah, nymphs," he shivers. "After Senaril that just turns me off more than anything."
[20:58] * Aaeru opens her mouth, before closing it with a frown. "Umm, is it, like, a dwarf thing? If you come across nymphs?"
[20:58] * Whurric turns back to Yuria at that, distracted from his plan of introducing himself to Aaeru, and frowns. "Wait, what? Why would you turn into a dwarf and what's it got to do with my being clean?"
[20:58] <Kotono> Sylvie brightens at Janson's words, resting her head against his hand.
[20:59] <Orval> "Is what a dwarf thing?" Orval asks.
[20:59] <Kotono> "Well, I totally heard you can become a dwarf if you spend time around dwarves. Like how you can become a dragon or a fey, right?"Yuria goes on, "So Aaeru and I figured that if we clean you it won't happen, since you won't be contagious!"
[20:59] <Aaeru> "The nymph thing," Aaeru says as if it were obvious. "Janson, like, resisted them and I would too so it's not a human thing."
[21:00] <Orval> "Our client was human!"
[21:00] <Whurric> "There'd be a lot more dwarves out in the world if that were true, lass. If anything, it's more likely we'd turn into humans going by that. Lots more of you than there are of us, y'know?"
[21:00] <Janson> "Filazan was human," Janson feels compelled to point out. "Until he turned into a wight, anyway. Died happy, but you wouldn't believe how those guys at the temple of Mystra like to complain..."
[21:01] <Aaeru> "Dying happy is important, I guess...." Aaeru trails off, now more confused than anything. "Umm. So, like, demons. Did you send them back to Hell?"
[21:01] * Whurric turns to Aaeru, momentarily turning there and notes, "I resisted 'em fairly well too, just so you know, so it's got nothing to do with race!"
[21:01] <Orval> "Aye, we did. Not a one of them left. The ladies of Janson's home took care of that." Orval nods.
[21:01] <Janson> "The daughters of Jannath did. You should've seen it - razor leaves, fire, lightning, spikes and fists of stone... it was incredible! Orval really got to see it close up, too!" Janson enthuses.
[21:02] <Kotono> "Oh!" Yuria grins, "How about I turn you into a cute human!" Smiling, and offering a hadn out, "Let's go!"
[21:02] <Aaeru> "Wow!"
[21:02] * Whurric snorts. "Indeed he did get a close sight."
[21:02] <Orval> "A bit too close."
[21:03] <Whurric> "I'm quite happy being a dwarf, though if I ever die and the elder's gift gets used on me, I suppose I could end up a 'cute human', lass," Whurric laughs.
[21:04] <Kotono> "You would, totally!" Yuria nods, "You'd make a great human!"
[21:04] <Orval> "You could even end up as a cute human lass." Orval grind at Wurric.
[21:04] <Aaeru> "There's magic for that," Aaeru agrees knowledgedly.
[21:06] <Janson> "There is," Janson agrees with a blush.
[21:06] <Kotono> "Oh wow, that would be so totally wrong!" Yuria mutters, shaking her head, "I don't want to have to become a demi-lesbian for that! You'd better stay a guy if you change, Whurric!"
[21:07] <Aaeru> "Oh! Right!" Aaeru exclaims all of a sudden. "I'm Aaeru! Nice to meet you two!"
[21:07] <Whurric> "I'll do my best, lass," Whurric says drily. "That said, could you explain where this about dwarves and baths and changing came from in the first place? Y'said you were talknig with Aaeru?" he asks, looking towards said person, nodding at her introduction. "Ah, I'm Whurric. Nice to meet you as well."
[21:08] * Aaeru smiles at him. "Silver told her," she answers his question.
[21:08] <Orval> "Same to you, lass. I'm Orval."
[21:08] * Aaeru is a bit more hesitant, but she smiles at Orval as well just the same.
[21:09] <Whurric> "Ah, the little one, yes. She's got some big lies in her little frame," Whurric replies with a nod.
[21:09] <Janson> "So, what's been happening with you girls while we've been out in the woods?" Janson asks. "Everything okay back home, Aaeru?"
[21:09] <Kotono> "Well, I mean, people become dragons and fey and change a lot so it's possible? I mean, I bet I could become a dwarf if I really wanted to!" Yuria says.
[21:10] <Kotono> At this Sylvie clears her throat, "Go on with your story first Aaeru, I'll fill in what happened with the pegasi," A glare at Yuria, "And then that coded scroll."
[21:10] <Aaeru> "Funny story about that!" Aaeru says. "So, like, I just got back home? And my neighbor made this naked statue and then used magic to make it move! And it had weapons and stuff, so I had to rush and save him! And after I did, it exploded and I flew all the way back home! Oh, but not my home here. The home where my parents live and stuff. I almost broke through the wall, too!"
[21:11] * Orval blinks and looks like he's concentrating for a moment, before a ball of light shimmers into existance over his right shoulder. "Ah, there ye are, Arachiel. I'm sorry ye stayed behind."
[21:11] <Janson> "Doesn't it seem like misfortune seems to follow us arou- huh?" Janson trails off and looks at Orval and his light curiously.
[21:12] <Aaeru> "I checked all of our neighbors after and it seems fine now!" Aaeru assures Janson happily. "I even made Tim promise not to build another statue until I visited again, so it should be a-okay!"
[21:12] * Whurric also looks at the little ball with surprise. "Another little one!" Whurric states in surprise as he also looks at the glowing familiar, not having been introduced to it yet.
[21:13] <Kotono> "A Lantern Archon?" Sylvie says, "That's what it looks like, anyway.'
[21:13] <Whurric> "Wait, is there even some little fey in all that light?" Whurric asks as he squints his eyes, trying to stare into the light.
[21:14] <Orval> The small ball of light pulses and from it, a childlike voice calls, "Take me with you next time then!"
[21:14] <Aaeru> "Hi, Archie!" Aaeru greets the ball of light, looking at it along with everyone else. "I'm Aaeru!"
[21:14] <Orval> "Sylvie's right, it's a minor celestial." Orval nods. "Everyone, Arachiel. Arachiel, everyone."
[21:14] <Orval> "Hello!" Crows the ball of light.
[21:14] <Janson> "What's a celestial doing here?" Janson asks, before remembering his manners. "Oh, hi, I'm Janson."
[21:15] <Orval> "It's my familiar." Orval says. "I left it behind to make sure the girls would be alright while we were gone, though I should have brought it along."
[21:15] <Whurric> "Hullo to you too," Whurric says politely to the little archon as he turns to his brother. "I'm curious as to where it came from as well, brother. You've been keeping secrets!"
[21:16] <Janson> "Oh, like Silver... but not too much like her, right?" Janson asks hopefully.
[21:16] <Orval> "Secrets are my business, Whurric!" Orval grins.
[21:17] <Orval> "Aye, Arachiel is a celestial, not a fey. Inherently good and kind."
[21:17] * Whurric harrumphs. "So what's Arachiel do for you anyhow?" he asks curiously.
[21:18] <Orval> "Arachiel is just like any other familiar, but it can also talk to anyone that can speak a language, teleport, and blast people with light rays."
[21:19] <Orval> "That, and it can repel evil at all times, which would have been very useful on our little trip."
[21:20] <Janson> "You keep saying 'it'. Isn't it a boy or a girl?" Janson asks curiously at the odd way of referring to the familiar. Then again, Silver could be called an 'it' now and then...
[21:20] <Kotono> "He does sound useful," Sylvie agrees, "More protections, the merrier."
[21:21] <Orval> "You know, I've never asked. I just assumed, since it's a holy ball of light." Orval turns to Arachiel. "Are you a boy or a girl?"
[21:22] <Kotono> As you talk, there is a thump coming up the stairs. Emerging out is Josa. He wears a frilly white apron, stained with flour and various food colorings. He wears robes the color of red apples, decorated with hanging metal bits, carved like gumdrops. Clapping his hands, "Ah, everyone is back!"
[21:22] <Janson> "Hey, Josa," Janson waves to the candymancer. "No share from our job, I'm afraid. Customer died of exhaustion."
[21:23] <Aaeru> With a snap of her fingers, an identical frilly apron appears over Aaeru's clothes. "And I've been practicing for mine!"
[21:23] <Orval> "Umm...I think I'm a girl. Maybe? We don't breed, so..." The blue ball pulses a bit.
[21:24] <Orval> "Alright then. Girl it is." There you have it."
[21:24] <Kotono> Sighing, "He died?! How did this miserable turn of events come to pass?!"
[21:25] <Kotono> "Nymphs and succubi," Sylvie speaks up, "The enemies of all men, women and employees of Whimsical Sweets."
[21:25] <Janson> "Exhaustion," Janson repeats sagely, nodding. "There was only him and Orval to satisfy so many women..."
[21:27] <Kotono> "Aaah! Feminine wiles subvert our fair and just cause! Oh cruel fate, why do you rain the arrows of misery and the shackles of poverty on us; have we not suffered enough under your harsh yoke?!" Sighing dramatically, "This is a horrible blow to our reputation!"
[21:28] <Janson> "Yeah, the guy at the temple of Mystra really laid the guilt trip on us," Janson nods sadly. "Still, as last words go I figure 'these old bones can still take it' are pretty good."
[21:30] <Kotono> "Perhaps." Josa sighs, "But at least we can manage that whilst our fate has turned. For we are in possession of a treasure map!"
[21:31] <Orval> "A treasure map?" Orval perks up.
[21:32] <Janson> "Do we know what the treasure is?" Janson asks. "'Cause I've read some of Sylvie's books and a lot of them have treasures like 'friendship' and 'hope' and 'courage' at the end."
[21:33] * Aaeru perks up at that. "Like, I figured it was boring riches but maybe it's a real treasure after all!"
[21:34] <Janson> "Oh, Aaeru," Janson gives her a sad look, "Don't you see? The treasure was in you all along!"
[21:34] <Kotono> "I'm sure this isn't like those," Sylvie pipes up, "Long story short, that thing of Dacote's was a Scroll of Riches. It's turned into a real treasure map! There's certain to be a real treasure there...but the flip is that it's not guaranteed to be free for the taking. It could be guarded."
[21:34] <Aaeru> "It was?"
[21:34] <Kotono> "Like, that sounds sort of dirty since Neveril's Aaeru's treasure," Yuria pipes up.
[21:35] <Kotono> Josa clears his throat, "AHEM! Irregardless of that particular interpretation of treasure, the facts of the matter stand that we have chanced into a possible windfall."
[21:35] <Janson> "Thank you, Yuria," Janson smiles nicely at the third blonde. "Anyway, so I guess this means it's less of a 'here's some abandoned treasure for anyone who finds it' and more of a 'here's a place where you can beat up some guys and take their life savings'?"
[21:36] * Aaeru isn't quite sure what to say to Yuria, but luckily Janson introduces a brand new topic for her to participate in! "It wouldn't really be right to do the latter, but maybe, like, there's ghosts or demons who don't want good people to find treasure? Then it's okay!"
[21:37] <Janson> "I guess they sort of signed up for this when they made the map," Janson allows with a shrug.
[21:37] <Aaeru> "If you're actually right we can totally just turn away and go back home!" Aaeru assures him.
[21:37] <Orval> "Could be bandits." Orval nods. "We'd be doing everyone a favor if we stopped them, and the treasure could be an added bonus. Besides, it doesn't mean we have to take it when we get there."
[21:40] <Kotono> "Indeed, further research is required!" Josa says, "For the moment, we need volunteers to spend time finding information about that area out. We can begin inquiring within the city."
[21:41] <Janson> "Where is it, anyway?" Janson asks.
[21:41] <Whurric> "What area?" Whurric echoes Janson's question.
[21:41] <Orval> "I'll be happy to do some research for this." Orval says eagerly.
[21:42] <Kotono> "It's to the east, a cove on the coast of the Barbarian Lands," Josa says, "Really, finding out about the entire area would help. Sylvie has speculated it may be a gnomish ruin, based on what you've said before, Janson."
[21:44] <Janson> "Could be, whole area's spotted with them, but most've been long cleared out. Never really explored much of the coast when I was younger, so couldn't say for sure," Janson offers. "Easiest way's to go out there and look for ourselves."
[21:44] * Whurric (~k@c-98-197-243-233.hsd1.tx.comcast.net) Quit (Ping timeout)
[21:47] <Orval> "Might I have a look at the map then?" Orval asks.
[21:49] <Aaeru> "And! And!" Aaeru says excitedly, almost bouncing. She goes to the supply closet to retrieve a small book. "My next job is in two days! It's about being nice to people and making people hire us more, so it's really important and stuff! They were nice and gave me this book about how to act the right way. Who else wants to come?"
[21:49] <Kotono> Sylvie nods, taking it out and unrolling it! It's a map of the coast of the Barbarian Lands. It goes up past the bay and to the jutting head of it out, just above the halfway point of it. Stabbing it with a finger, "There, it's out of the bay and into the Pasatic Ocean proper. It's a day and change's ship ride barring unfavorable winds. It's much longer by foot, especially since we'd be
[21:49] <Kotono> slowed down by the Barbarian Lands."
[21:50] <Janson> "Unless we split up probably better to handle Aaeru's job first? The treasure shouldn't be going anywhere, right?"
[21:50] <Kotono> "Probably not," Sylvie agrees, "It could be anything, from a gnome ruin to a bandit hole to a dragon's lair. We'd best go expecting the worst and hoping for the best."
[21:51] * Orval nods. "We'll do that then. We'll check the area for ruins after Aaeru's job."