There's not enough bitching

[Brian]

Warning: I am an asshole.

Ech....  This is kind of a long story if you haven't read the fic in question.

To try and simplify things, basically, I liken one of the characters (pretty much constantly) to dogs.  His speech indicators are 'barked', 'whined', 'growled', etc. where it wouldn't be too grating, and when I finally rolled around to writing a scene from _his_ PoV, I decided he'd be color-blind.  Just like dogs aren't (urban legend -- they just percieve colors as muted).

This also let me joke at the standard fanfiction thing of identifying characters by hair-color, since to him, it was either light gray, gray, or dark gray.

So, I get a review that ... actually, here's the relevant part:

Especially when you refer to Sakura as "the gray-haired girl." And later you pull the same crap with Naruto. Come on. No one thinks of Sakura or Naruto as gray-haired. I don't care if there's a bunch of ash in their hair from explosive tags. You didn't make a point of their hair changing colors. Conveying that information in inane referrants is just a terrible choice. Completely throws readers out of the story for nothing.

So, I was suckered in.  I thought this was legit, and he was dumb.  So I reply ... and ff.net didn't save the first reply.  Well, basically I told him that Kiba was color-blind; all colors are gray.

Witless:

Have you ever talked to a color blind person? They don't refer to everything as gray. That's not nuance. That's just nonsensical. If you couldn't see color, you would not specifically use color to differentiate things. If everything was gray, then being gray is totally not noteworthy.

Also, the issue with your writing about referring to people as cute little descriptions of them rather than their names still stands. It's a bad habit and your writing would be better without it. If you want to dismiss criticism by insulting the critic, yelling at them, and telling them that if they don't like the story they can just stop reading, that's your choice.

I would point out, though, that I obviously like your story. I already left a review to this effect, but the characterizations are spot on and the plot set up is intriguing. That does not mean your writing is flawless. Many writers post fanfiction to get feedback so they can improve their writing. I apologize for mistaking you for such a person.

Sincerely,

Wittgen

Which, naturally, means it's on.

Did you know there's more than one type of color-blindness? If you did, you would realize that in some cases, color-blindness is complete. In some, it's red-green, or blue-green color-blind (etc.), so there's still partial color recognition. Do you know which one should be more obvious to a reader? Seriously -- five minutes of internet research would clear that up for you.

On that note, it's inaccurate insofar as the REASON Kiba's color blind is a joke at him being close to dogs (just like most of his speech indicators are ostensibly things that could be assigned to dogs in this story (another subtlety I'm positive you didn't get)). Dogs aren't actually color-blind, as much as their perception of color is greatly muted.

How much fun would THAT be to read? (Also? Internet research again.)

Secondly, on your issue with descriptors to avoid repetition: This is a bullshit opinion. YOU DON'T LIKE IT. THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT WRONG.

Seriously, people have been using alternate descriptors to avoid repetition of names for centuries -- it's a tradition dating back to the oral preservation of Homer's poems from Greece, literally thousands of years older than your 'bad fanfiction convention'. (Again? 5 minutes of goddamned internet research.)

If it REALLY bothers you, go through every single line of the fic and replace all instances of other descriptors with proper names. Oooh, doesn't THAT make it an amazing and different story?

So, given THAT, do you honestly believe I give a crap about the rest of your review? I see you're trying to make up for your earlier tone, but I don't particularly care. I am an English major with a minor in Mythology. Where's your English degree? I'm not going to claim to be infallible, but I know for a fact I'm a damn sight more sure of what I'm writing about than you are.

I DO care to improve my writing, I DON'T care to teach myself to conform to something to satisfy _one_ opinionated idiot who thinks that his opinion is _fact_. You haven't mistaken me for someone who wants meaningful feedback; you've mistaken yourself for someone who's capable of giving it. And you're not. If you can't even figure out the fact/opinion hurdle, AND you judge without bothering to research ANYTHING you say....

It's great that you enjoy my writing, but I still think you're a moron. Enjoy it quietly, since I know for a fact most of it goes way, way over your head. Also? I take no pains to hide the fact that I'm an asshole -- continue to leave me stupid remarks, and I'll continue to treat you like the idiot you are. Until I get bored and ignore you, anyway; we've already established that you can provide no insights of meaningful value.

See, he kind of snared me with that first response, where he comes across as somewhat reasonable (and mostly he got me by saying he still enjoyed the story (sadly, I fell for this)).

And here's his response:

I did know there was more than one type of color blindness. Did you know that my point had absolutely nothing to do with the specifics of color blindness? 10 seconds of actually reading my first paragraph (if you're slow) would clear up for you that my point is about how someone who can't differentiate color would not categorize people by the color of their hair. Constantly using descriptors instead of names is a crutch that reduces readability, but using descriptors the POV character would never use is an extra layer of inanity.

I know that certain techniques were used to great effects in the orally transmitted Greek epics, but I hope that fancy English major of yours will eventually teach you that a)we've learned a lot about writing English over the years and b)English is not Greek. Maybe you'll even learn about logical fallacies like appeal to authority and ad hominem attacks.

I wish you luck in these endeavors, but please do not bother me anymore. If you need further help on avoiding common fanfic errors, please refer to this series of excellent essays on the topic: m-mcgregor.livejournal. com/128509. html#cutid1 (Remove the spaces first.)

Sincerely,

Wittgen


PS: You do care what I have to say. That's why you've written far more than me yelling about how I'm stupid and wrong.

God.  I wanted to tell him he still utterly failed to defeat the opinion!=fact hurdle, but I can't, because he's hiding behind his coward's response of running away from the fight he started.  Also, not sure what he expects that whole "I obviously care" bit to mean -- naturally I do, or I wouldn't have replied at all.  But then, given he's written jack shit, and I post prodigiously, I would put good money on him investing more time into this, even if I do have more keystrokes.

I guess it's petty.  I was really about to win an internet fight ... and then he ran away.  Guess that's because he couldn't handle the heat, but talk about being robbed. :\

Meh, raged out now.  I burn bright, but brief.

[Anastasia]

There's a lot of merit to not directly replying to reviews. He does come across as either a troll, a 'tard or a jerk, and none of them are worth wasting time on. Ah well, live and learn.

[Dracos]

Uh... I'd go with 'feel better, don't send that' personally.  Good to feel better, but really, seems to be going far.

[Brian]

There's a lot of merit to not directly replying to reviews. He does come across as either a troll, a 'tard or a jerk, and none of them are worth wasting time on. Ah well, live and learn.

You make a profound point that I feel all the more foolish for not realizing earlier.

Dangit.  I wish I didn't get so angry.

[Dracos]

Today kinda sucks.

[Anastasia]

Today sucked. On the flip side there are signs tomorrow won't.

[Jon]

Today sucked. On the flip side there are signs tomorrow won't.

Depends where you are in the world, I guess. It's a good thing (for my convenience, anyway) that I wasn't planning on visiting Sendai this time.

[Brian]

I was woken up at 4:00 AM for a tsunami warning.  While we are on the bay, there IS a mountain range between us and the ocean proper, so it seemed a waste to wake up the entire county for something that should only affect the coast.

[Dracos]

I was woken up at 4:00 AM for a tsunami warning.  While we are on the bay, there IS a mountain range between us and the ocean proper, so it seemed a waste to wake up the entire county for something that should only affect the coast.

My story as well.  Still lagged from it.

[Dracos]

Waiting sucks.  Buggy strange day sucks too.

[Anastasia]

I've been in a bad mood most of the day for no particular reason. It's starting to lift away, but fuck it sucks.

[Brian]

I've been in a bad mood most of the day for no particular reason. It's starting to lift away, but fuck it sucks.

I hate when that happens. :x

Try and find something to laugh about anyway?

[Music-chan]

My brand new monitor has a dead pixil. Sadface :(

[Dracos]

Horrible sneezing cold is horrible -_-

[Anastasia]

Sounds like traveler's flu.