What I've learned as an RPG player

[RangerShade]

1. Never get on the GM's bad side.

2. If you do get on their bad side; never go first, never go last, and never volunteer for *anything*.

3. Real men may despise cheap tactics, but they tend not to live very long anyway so its a moot point.

4. Being evil gives you more options but is also less reliable in a crunch situation.

5. There is no such thing as too many weapons unless they belong to the other side.

6. Your friends can be more dangerous then your enemies, so make sure they're always in front of you.

7.  Stupid players attract fireballs and high explosives like nothing else. This can be used to your advantage.

8. He who has the gold winds up being everyone else's target.

9. Random acts of insanity have the advantage of being unpredictable, but don't rely on them.

10. Never get into a pissing contest with anything that has more teeth then you do.

[RangerShade]

1. You are NOT invincible. This means YOU!

2. Charging headfirst toward an army while waving a big sword around
make look cool in the movies, but it tends to be fatal.

3. Swords are melee weapons. Bows and Crossbows are ranged weapons.
   Melee weapons require you be close to the enemy. If the enemy has bows
   and you only have a sword, they will obviously shoot you first if you come
   at them straight on. In conclusion: Never bring a sword to a crossbow fight.
   (you know who I'm talking about ^^')

4.  If you can't think on your feet, expect to be dragged away by them.

5. Walking straight into a dungeon is just *asking* for trouble. Check for traps...always.

6. Throwing things in a close quarters fight where your own team mates are involved is just *asking*
   for "friendly" fire.

7.  Trying to see in the dark tends to be futile...unless you're an elf, or a dwarf, or a halfling...

8. Make sure its loaded. If you don't, expect the GM to laugh as your crossbow goes *click* and nothing happens.

9.  Spells can be used more then one way. Don't get trapped by conventional thinking.

10. Teamwork. It's not just a suggestion, its the only way you'll make through in one piece!

[Priss]

1. If you managed to get yourself into a really small hole somehow, it's up to you to figure out how to get out. Just cause God (GM) let you squeeze IN there, doesn't mean God (GM) has to let you OUT. Use your BRAIN!

2. Just because monster characters with high charisma is allowed in a game, doesn't mean that the average non-monster character isn't gonna be frickin' TERRIFIED of it! Charisma tends to be within one's type, not outside it... especially if the GM is sadistic.

3. Miracles do not exist. If something seems like a miracle now, it will inevitably turn out to be a really cruel and nasty joke later on.

4. War IS a great way to make a profit. However, it's also a great way to get KILLED... which eradicates all profit. Generally, it's a better idea to stay OUT of it.

5. Idiots come in all shapes and sizes. Unfortunately, they also tend to show up when least helpful and/or expected. Such as when you're working with sensitive pieces of HE and a single clumsy move could blow you sky-high...

6. Getting on the GMs bad side, while not good, is sometimes better than being on the GMs GOOD side. Especially when said GM has a thing for the good Marquis de Sade...

7.  Expect the UNexpected.  However, this does NOT preclude expecting the expected... The three kobolds that you would NORMALLY expect to be hiding in that cave can kill you just as well as the red dragon that you've prepared for...

8.  Take a very cautious attitude towards the campaign if the GM allows some seriously unusual characters at the beginning. It's either going to be un-godly overpowered, or demonicly twisted... @_@

9.  The laws of physics are not negated simply because you're in an RPG. You run off a cliff, you will NOT simply hover there without some concious action. In a like vein, if you set off an explosive next to a wall or in a tunnel, you WILL be buried, and it WILL be your own damn fault.

10. Never underestimate a lowly NPC. Just because the fireball/lazer/bullet/arrow/whatever missed YOU doesn't mean you were the target in the first place.

Siobhan L.R. Ward
The Cybernetic Ninja