Soulriders 5.0: Legend of the Unending Games

The Inn of Last Home...(^'o'^) => Creative Writing Section => Writing Section => Topic started by: Brian on December 29, 2005, 05:35:56 PM

Title: [Ranma][WAFF] Plain Okonomiyaki III: Order to Go
Post by: Brian on December 29, 2005, 05:35:56 PM
It's that time of year again!

The last of the fics I promised Ginrai I would write....
Title: [Ranma][WAFF] Plain Okonomiyaki III: Order to Go
Post by: thepanda on December 29, 2005, 08:01:50 PM
Nice one. I like Hiroshi and Daisuke's characterization. There was a bit of confusion near the end with the forman and Ranma's 'sister' but I eventually got it.

Edit: Was there a part 1 and 2?
Title: [Ranma][WAFF] Plain Okonomiyaki III: Order to Go
Post by: Dracos on December 30, 2005, 06:37:26 PM
I enjoyed it.  It was a litttttle rough in the Ukyou explanation bit.  You lost me there when you were referencing manga events that I've long forgotten the details of.  And it was a little bit too easy...  not much resistance in the fic.

But it was cute and sappy and I enjoyed reading it.

Dracos
Title: [Ranma][WAFF] Plain Okonomiyaki III: Order to Go
Post by: Brian on December 30, 2005, 10:25:04 PM
Panda: Yep!

Part one is here (http://florestica.com/brandall/oneshot/pok/index.htm), and part two is here (http://florestica.com/brandall/oneshot/tif/index.htm).

Glad Hiroshi and Daisuke worked -- those characterizations will be re-used elsewhere....  :D

Drac: Yeah, I know it's sappy ... but that's what it set out to be, so it looks like it worked. :p  Thanks!
Title: [Ranma][WAFF] Plain Okonomiyaki III: Order to Go
Post by: Dracos on December 30, 2005, 11:51:48 PM
Yup, I figured such, so didn't give any advice to 'fix' what was clearly intended :)

Dracos
Title: [Ranma][WAFF] Plain Okonomiyaki III: Order to Go
Post by: Jason_Miao on December 31, 2005, 06:38:01 PM
Will comment on later, once I have time to read it.  But I wanted to point out that Time Is Funny's URL is http://www.florestica.com/brandall/oneshot/tif/index.htm, so you may want to edit the URL in your new fic to reflect that.