This is something I've been thinking about alot lately. Since RPing is familiar around here, it seems to be a good place to ask this.
The internet is a wonderous place, full of strange and happy things to see, not to mention the vast section of people to talk with. With every person(And bots, Ayame dear.) comes a gender. He, she, her, his, all of these are the inescapable markers of gender that are attached to people. But, to the point.
Do these matter at all? Does it matter if the girl or guy your chatting with isn't what they claim to be? For example, say that I started claming I was a girl and proved it. Would this affect how you thought of me? Would it matter at all to you? Or, on the other end of the spectrum, say Calender was revealed to be a 45 year old guy living in his parent's basement. (Sorry, Calender, I needed someone to use.) Would anything change, or would she/he still be just 'Calender'?
And no, I'm not a girl. Don't go adiggin here. -_-
*shrugs*
Personally, I can't care less ^_^
If you're a friend, you're still gonna be a friend. If I hate your guts, I'm STILL gonna hate your guts. You're identified more by the personality than the importance of stuff like gender. Since you can't see the other person online in the first place, I think it's pretty stupid to place it as so important ^_^
It might be weird to find out that he/she gets off pretending to be the opposite sex, but hey, *shrugs* it's their perogative ^_^
So long as I don't find out what their true genders are I could care less. If, for some reason, I happen to find out they're only playing at their gender I would have to say that yes it would effect the way I treat them.
There are established do and don't that I've grown up with.
*Shrugs*
That's just the way I am, I guess.
I'd like to say that it wouldn't change things if I found out a friend has been pretending that they were something they were not, but I won't for one very simple reason.
What kind of a friend would go out of their way to lie so much to you? Can they honestly be considered someone you can trust if they've been lying to you for a long while?
I can understand if it's just not saying what your real gender is, but if you're going out of your way to maintain the lie, even up to the point that you start distorted other things just to keep it up...
Yes, I'd likely drop all contact with them.
Hmm. Do I agree 100% with Leon here?
Yup, pretty much.
Face it, people. Lying about who you are should be a crime. It IS a crime, in certain forms. Like identity theft. But I'll not get into that now.
The deal is, if you are someone's friend, and all of a sudden she becomes a he(just an example), then all of my feelings for said person would be warped and twisted. I look at females differently than I look at men. Perhaps I'm alone in this, perhaps not.
Personally, if someone I knew did that, and I found out one way or another, I'd feel violated, deeply. Like some kind of sacred truth had been shown to be a lie.
I implicitly trust people. When they say something to be true, I believe them, because I trust them. If someone says they're a girl, fine. They're a girl.
I'd really rather not constantly be doubting that fact. The thought of that creeps the living shit out of me.
P.S. For the record, I'm 20, Male, and in need of a signifigant other, preferably female. Kwok, you stay the hell away. I'm warning you. I have a sharp, pointy stick. DO NOT MAKE ME USE IT.
Aww ;_;
But you didn't say that last time we were together! You have another man, don't you! You're cheating on me, aren't you! Aren't you! >_<
There is no "us." I cannot cheat on you. And I wouldn't, either. Because if I ever paired up with you, my brain would certainly commit suicide. Thus, I cannot cheat on you.
And besides, I don't have ANYONE. Thus my searching for a signifigant other.
Well, like Olg, it's... I'd wonder why you were lying to me like that.
For most of you, it wouldn't really bother me that much to find out something like that... although I'd probably never really place any trust in you, or at least for a very long while.
For the rest? I have no idea how I'd react. ^^
As for Calendar... well... *beats Dunefar over the head with a very big stick*
:P
So, Dune, what would you say if Ayame was actually a 29 year old waiter in a posh restaurant?
You trained him very well. Remarkably well even.
^_^
Fearless Leader
Ugg, I'm reminded of Fox.
*throws up*
=X
It's a good question, Spatula Lord, and one I had to face a few years back myself...
My answer was, for the most part, denial of the issue in general. I make a point of NOT asking someone their gender, as well as not mentioning my own unless pointed asked (well, except for the A/S/L question, which I blow off because it's so damn annoying).
I've discovered, over the last 2 years for example, that a number of my online friends are not what they claimed to be... and gender being only one of the many inconsistancies that came up. These days, I just assume everyone (online) has at least one "off" or "exaggerated" piece of history attached to them. Kind of cynical, but that's what I've settled into.
*shrug*
I take everyone as "male" until they prove otherwise!
Er... seriously? I'd take them as what they say they are, up to a point. If they're not what they said at the start, that's okay, I'll still talk to them the same as before.
^_^; However, if they start weirding me out...
I'd have absolutely no idea what to do, to be honest.
With most things of this nature, I'd probably follow my time-tested instinct, which has gotten me into as much trouble as it's landed me in.
Seriously? If someone wants to pretends to be a chick or a guy, good for them. As long as they're not a fuckhead elsewhere, I couldn't give a shit.
Quote from: Rezantis on December 20, 2002, 10:12:23 PM
So, Dune, what would you say if Ayame was actually a 29 year old waiter in a posh restaurant?
"Marry me!" might be one possibility ^_^
Rez - Hmm...It would explain the fact that Ayame is flatter than a pancake. ^_^
Kwok - Since Ayame says I'm already engaged to her, it's moot.... -_-
Quote from: Spatula Lord on December 21, 2002, 07:02:26 AM
Kwok - Since Ayame says I'm already engaged to her, it's moot.... -_-
You don't sound happy ^_^
FEEL THE LUV! ^_^
Ever since Ayame dear got that whip collection, it's been...painful at times. -_-
Since when did you start dating her, Dune? o_O
Kaneda seems to remember you calling her a frigid bitch...
She just walked up and started getting friendly.
REAL friendly. One thing led to another...and you know how fickle Ayame dear is...But anyway.
Uh, to steer this back ontopic and away from spammage...
Okay, I'll go into the scenario that inspired this post. At another board I go to, a certain poster tends to be mistaken for a girl at times. His actions can lead to this, even without the intent to. I got to thinking about this after the lastest faux pas with it. I mean, really, does personal gender matter that much online? Should it have to match up with your real life gender, and is it a bad or wrong thing to pretend otherwise?
It's worth thinking on.
For me at least, online gender is a variable thing... especially since many people have very different personalities online then they do in person.
Knowing a person's gender is handy in some cases, however. For example, being able to refere to a person as Him or Her, instead of simply It (I end up using Them and They a lot... but that can also get confusing if I'm only talking about one person).
Yesterday, a friend on IRC found out I was male. Apparently, he assumed I was female the whole time? O_O
IMHO, Dune, it's wrong once you know you're going to hurt someone with it. Malicious intent = Badness. Otherwise, do as you will.
*assumes shocked pose*
Dune, how did you know?!
...so joking there.
Erm. Well, I don't know how I'd react. Hm. I'd probably be upset that I was lied to, because I hate when people lie to me over long periods of time. I really, really hate it.
Liars. Hate them. Hate hate hate hate HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHA-
Er, sorry. Slightly psychotic right now. Must be lack of sleep.
*pat-pats Yuth nervously*
Erm... scary...