As Director's Commentary most likely won't be ready for some time....
Put your sarcastic wit to work, and post your one-liners here.
<Death> Dracos: Hey, if magic exists its worth trying.
"Secondly, the wolf was sent to protect your friend."
Brian> Holy shit! It's the box-cutter kid!
It all began with a cold root beer, early, on January 1st, 2007.
Dracos
"Crime doesn't pay"
Dracos
"When youpicked Shade's brain, you found out about that thirty bucks he owes me, right? Because if you control him now, I'm pretty sure the debt transfers over to you."
<Ginrai> "Still, how did a guy that paranoid end up getting caught?"
Brian> 'Ayame' says, (in a word-balloon): "It looks like you're trying to hack a covert network!"
Dracos
[15:37] <Shade> roll 2#1d6
[15:37] <Chibi-Suu> Them bones was tossed for Shade ... : 2#1d6 --> [ 1d6=1 ]{1}, [ 1d6=1 ]{1}
Snake Eyes!
EDIT:
[20:02] <Rez> "Ginrai, they're tied up. Stop trying to scare them."
Dracos
And now, the complete, unedited script from a rejected episode for the TV series "Monk", entitled "Mr. Monk and the Metahuman".
[INT: WORKSHOP. San Francisco police mill about, analyzing the crime scene. A massive spray of blood paints the floor and walls, emitting from a point just outside a massive, three-foot thick vault door. In the foreground, STOTTLEMEYER talks with MONK, while SHARONA stands to the side, trying not to look at the gruesome display.]
STOTTLEMEYER: The victim was named "Takeshi Fujinaka", age 21. Family says he's been in Japan up until about a week ago, though customs has no record of him coming into the country. The ME says... from what she found of the body... he probably died about 19 hours ago.
[STOTTLEMEYER looks down at the blood stains, then looks back up at MONK; suprised to see that he is ignoring the blood and instead concentrating on the massive, open door.]
MONK: This door was locked from the inside... Why would the killer stay in a room that was locked from the inside? It doesn't make any sense...
[All pause, thinking. Then MONK's face brightens.]
MONK: Of course! He wasn't satying here, he was imprisoned, because he was a living engine of blood and death. And then when he got set free, Fujinaka decided to mouth off to him, because he was an idiot, and then he got ripped open like a can of tuna.
STOTTLEMEYER: CASE CLOSED!
[CAPTAIN YOAZ, a giant chicken, rides into view on a motorcycle.]
YOAZ: I'm going to haul ass to Lollapalooza!
[ROLL CREDITS]
QuoteGinrai: 156$ (150$ table (first piece of Dracos's house destroyed), 6$ lead pipe -- last known surviving piece of Dracos' house)
<Ginrai> Bri: By the end of the game, that pipe will be worth much more than the $6 that was used to buy it!
<Bjorn> "Yeah, hi, we have this secret lab for illegal human experimentation, and these guys stole some routers from us, and we'd, uh, like to report the theft, please."
<Dracos> "They just ripped my eyes out, no biggie."
Dracos
<Bjorn> And, I hate to say it, but... what about Ginrai?
<Rez> He's playing with the pipe.
<Rez> "So, Ginrai, what do you think?"
<Rez> "Well, Mr Lucky Pipe says . . ."
<Rez> "Right. Thanks."
<Bjorn>: I'm still outside the door.
<Bjorn>: ...
<Bjorn>: I wanna cast magic missile!
<Huitzil> How the hell did you know that?
<Dracos> Does that really matter, Mr. Anderson? What you should be asking, is how you are going to say anything when you have...no mouth.
<Huitzil> But I do you fucking idiot.
<Dracos> No mouth.... God damn it, can't props do anything right?
Dracos
Okay, someone rip out his spine for that.
<Bjorn> Rez is about to have the metahuman dick-size war with Unseen.
<Bjorn> <Rez> You think you're all badass cause you blew up a shed? We blew up San Francisco, man.
<Rez> Hm.
<Rez> How many mental derangements have the party picked up?
<Bjorn> Well, that's kinda hard to say, really.
<Brian> Dracos: Eyes torn out.
<Brian> Bjorn: Locked in captivity for x days.
<Brian> Huitzil: Living on the lam for 6 solid months.
<Brian> Shade: Severe case of dead.
<Brian> Rez: Found out his best friend knows what kind of porn he looks at.
<Brian> Ginrai: Traveled with you guys across a country.
<Brian> Poor guy.
[The scene opens on the setting of RIPONDELL]
EZMERETH: This bracelet MUST be taken to Mt. Fuji, and henceforth be destroyed!
BJORN *looking at the bracelet nervously* : I will take it! But this bracelet is a heavy burden, and I do not know the way.
DRACOS: You'll not be alone. You shall have my sword.
REZ: And my bow!
GINRAI: And the pipe!
[All turn to look at Ginrai for a long minute, and then back to the bracelet.]
BJORN: Um, anyway....
Rez> "So killcount guys?"
Dracos
<@Brian> Seeing as it's hightech, but not screaming out From: Relm ('tyrean_@samiam.org')
<@Brian> Bah.
<@Brian> Seeing as it's hightech, but not screaming out "terrorist"....
Don't Trust Anyone Who Speaks With An Australian Accent!
<Dracos> Anyway, we kill the Vampire, then we take his ruby, and give it to the Titan. Then we can access the Earth Cave!
Dracos
<Ezmereth> Where's the dreamer?
<Victor> Well, I was feeling a bit peckish, so I ate him.
Dracos
Rez> Brainscan the kid! The kid!
Dracos> But... Okay, I brainscan the kid.
BCK> *Gun to face*
Dracos> Fuck.
Bjorn> What have we learned kids?
Bjorn> Whenever you lie, an airplane stewardress dies.
Dracos
[10:06] <OkibiOhki> Post. :)
[10:11] <Dracos> ...o_O;;
[10:12] <Dracos> That's...unpossible, I mean you've already described it as something quite hard o_O;;
[10:12] <Dracos> Even if my deduction roll was bad, my tactics roll should've been good enough to indicate we were at a disadvantage o_O:;
[10:14] <Dracos> At the least, if the deduction is giving me that and you want me to play it, give me something more to work with.
[10:14] <Dracos> Without having any reasoning why I think it's a snap, I really would have trouble playing it.
[10:16] <OkibiOhki> <Dracos> I cannot see the forest for the trees, explain how I figured it out to me.
[10:16] <OkibiOhki> You didn't fail your roll.
[10:16] <OkibiOhki> It's really that easy.
I am an idiot.
Dracos
AIM log:
--
Dracos: Neither. In the interest of preserving the greater good, one should kill them all and thus preserve the resources they would devour for the others.
Rez raises an eyebrow.
Rez: Are you -sure- you wouldn't rather be working for Pax Arcana?
--
Mutant commie traitor!
--
Shairthewm: Really, there's a question we are all at a disadvantage at.
Shairthewm: Do you know what it is?
Rez: I have no idea what you're talking about. ^_^
Shairthewm: Who is our team five?
Rez: Our team five?
Rez: You, me, Uns, Bjorn, Ginrai.
Shairthewm: Right.
Rez: OK.
Shairthewm: Now who is Pax's team five?
Rez: Oh.
Rez: That's easy.
Rez: Caber, Caber, Caber, Caber and Caber.
Shairthewm: HAH
--
COOPER TEAM!
Ah, the beauty of the caste system.
<Rez> .....
CHANSERV> This channel is moderated.
<+Dracos> Ready to go?
<+Liandral> Ah-yup.
<Dracos> Okay, we need a clever plan for when we run into the unstoppable evil.
<Rez> RUN AWAY!
Dracos
Massive spider-like robotic warmachine vaporizes rock, superheats air.
<@Brian> "What was that?" Liandril asks shakily.
<@Bjorn> <Rez> Oh, don't worry. It's just being friendly.
<@Bjorn> <Liandral> ... What?
<@Bjorn> <Rez> Sure! You just can't show fear. I'll go up to it, and give it a bone, and it'll leave me alone.
<@Bjorn> <Liandral> You think it's a dog?!
<@Bjorn> <Rez> Yeah, but not some pansy elf dog. It's a real man's dog.
The mechaspider's reign of terror continues.
<@Brian> I think we need some of Ginrai's patent optimism here.
<@Brian> <Rez> What we really need, in order to defeat it, is the reciept.
<@Brian> <Liandral> What good would THAT do?
<@Brian> <Dracos> It'd show that it was out of warranty, and cause it to spontaneously break down.
<Rez> I dunno.
<Rez> You gotta remember, we have the world's greatest online shopper on our side!
<Ginrai> You could always hope that the power runs out soon....
<@Bjorn> Ah, yes.
<@Bjorn> Patent optimism.
After one of the ropes Drac's walking on snaps, frightening him to the point of standing still on the middle of the bridge:
<Ginrai> <Rez> Drac, if you fall to your death say 'Hi!' to Ayame and Shade for me!
Ginrai is finally starting to catch up... o_O
<Ginrai> Having a fun time, Bjorn? ^^
<Faceless> No. >.<
<Faceless> Fucking other-selves who can't keep it in their pants.
Rez: <Huitzil> "But... what could a bard do against an army like that?"
Rez: <Rez> He can talk!
Rez: <Dracos> He can talk?
Rez: <Rez> He can talk!
Rez: <Dracos> He can talk!
Rez: <Rez> o/` He can SIIIIIIINNNNNGGGGG! o/`
QuoteEkim cups his hands delicately around the shards, frowning speculatively. "This is fine work," he rumbles, obviously impressed. "Very fine." He starts laying the sword on a nearby anvil, piece by piece, as though assembling a puzzle. "Mmmm," he muses rocking back on his heels. "How could a sword of such craft fail?"
Many, many years before...<HADRICK SHUKER> Eleven oh one, eighteen sixteen, that's the order number on this one. Now, the nice thing about these Archonae-forged blades....
*Hadrick smacks the sword against the counter a few times, causing it to break.
<HADRICK> OW! Ooooh, that hurt.... Oh, that hurt big-time.
[If you haven't seen knives.mpeg... why not?]
<@Bjorn> Ginrai certainly has an interesting strategy, doesn't he?
<@Bjorn> <Radegast> Soon Mirallia will realize that your former selves were most likely the ones who killed her predecessor.
<@Bjorn> <Ginrai> Okay, cool, let's go help her with that conclusion.
<Ginrai> not what I was expecting... ^^;
<@Brian> That's about exactly it, Bjorn.
<Rezantis> You know, this siege is -really going to suck-.
<Bjorn> Yeah.
<Rezantis> I hope the general each day is wearing a big flalshing light or something.
<Bjorn> Well, he'll probably be a twelve-foot flaming demon of death.
<Bjorn> So, pretty much.
<Bjorn> Or we can put up signs.
<Bjorn> "FREE COOKIES FOR EVIL GENERALS."
<Rezantis> Bwahahahaha
<Bjorn> Of course, you'd probably end up switching sides.
<Bjorn> You dirty cookie fetishist.
<Rezantis> Yeah. I would. ^^
[23:54] <Ginrai> Bri: Other than increasing INT and END, is there any other way to make casting spells less strenuous for my character?
[23:55] <Brian> Sending a check or money order addressed to Brian Randall, 555 E. Washington, Apt.# 2203, Sunnyvale, Ca, 94086
Dracos
Drac manages to dodge and retrieve his sword, and the fight continues, in an awe-inspiring display of swordsmanship and skill . . .
*swish*
*swoosh*
*swish*
*swoosh*
*swish*
*swoosh*
<Farwell> . . . alright, screw this - BOTH of you incompetents can get the hell out!
Shairthewm: You know
Shairthewm: I'm sort of good at tactics...but...
Shairthewm: when an army declares me to be the tactical expert of 30000 warriors....
Rezantis: It's pretty simple, really.
Shairthewm: X_X
Rezantis: Creep/Counter beats Rush, Rush beats Teching, Teching beats Creep/Counter.
Dracos
Imagine if casting had gone a little differently....
Ginrai as the Vassal of Hamar!
<Mirallia> And things progressed as they might, but should not... and thus I came to commit the gravest sin.
<Ginrai> So, you're saying we had sex? Does that mean that we should have sex now? I'm not clear on that, so I thought I would ask out loud, so the GM... you can confirm that point for me.
Dracos as The Bard!
<Dracos> Let me idly sing ye the song of the armoured warrior Gato, and the bounty he would idly pay to any strong enough to idly vanquish him.
Rez as the Fallen King!
<Rez> I never really liked jewelry anyways. Besides, isn't Ginrai supposed to be the one who works with wolves?
Bjorn as a Over-Muscled Barbarian!
<Bjorn> This is... probably unfair. Maybe they can send two generals at a time, to even things out?
Huitzil as the Lorekeeper!
<Huitzil> NONE SHALL PASS, MOTHERFUCKER!
Oops, I forgot.
<@Brian> The strategy guide recommends Dracos be switched out of the party for boss fights . . .
Boss Fight 1: Shot dead.
Boss Fight 2: Duh, where'd my sword go?
I can't wait for number 3. ^^
DaTCraft:
<Dreadmarch> LOLZ OMG DREADRUSH!
<Dracos> Destroy their SCVs/Drones/Peons!
<Rez> I forgot, this is what usually happens to scouts in RTS games....
<Bjorn> Build up our tech tree!
<Unseen> More defensive structures!
<Ginrai> AFK -- BBL.
<+Rez> Um, Dracos? I'm back.
<@Dracos> Oh, good. How'd everything go?
<+Rez> Uh ... swell. Really swell.
<@Dracos> I see. Did you refuel the army?
<+Rez> ...yes. Yes I did.
<@Dracos> Uh-huh. How come when you pulled into the driveway I saw all sorts of dents on the fenders?
<+Rez> Well, I, uh, you see -- YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ME!
* +Rez runs to his room and slams the door.
@Dracos sets mode +Rez -v
Brian makes a mysterious attack roll (which hits), then rolls damage . . .
Quote
[07:41] <Brian> roll 3d6 for no particular reason
[07:41] <Chibi-Suu> them bones was tossed for Brian ... :3d6 for no particular reason --> [ 3d6=7 ]{7}
* Faceless has just been shot in the head by Silvershaft.
* Relm baps Faceless.
<Relm> You have 8 resistant PD armour. Which means it's someone else in trouble here.
<Relm> Like . . . Drac's oxen.
* Relm considers.
* Faceless has no helmet.
<Relm> That's because helmets are for wusses.
<Faceless> Don't you have a helmet?
<Relm> The laws of drama indicate that you won't be hit in the head except by a major villain.
<Faceless> A helmet, I might addd, with earflaps.
<Relm> Yes, but it's only for ornamentation.
* Relm looks better with a helmet. Have you got any idea how hard it is to take care of hair in such conditions?
<Faceless> It's like the ultimate wuss met the ultimate dweeb, and they bred in a horrific display of disgusting sexuality that set back the course of human civilization by a century and a half.
-----
<Relm> Yeah, we have no archer heroes thus far!
<Brian> Well, there's Erik, but he missed.
<Faceless> Pfft.
<Faceless> That's because Archer Heros all suck.
<Relm> Well, what good is he then?
<Brian> He's got detection abilities.
<Brian> <Erik> The Dreadmarch is near!
<Brian> <Dracos> You mean, in the trench?
<Brian> <Erik> Yeah!
<Brian> <Dracos> The one's we're fighting?
<Brian> <Erik> Yeah, yeah. That's them. They're REAL close.
---
* Faceless will play Rez!
<Faceless> I can do it real good-like!
<Faceless> And worst come to worst, hey, there's five of us!
<Drac-sick> "I BRACE TO SHOOT! I SHOOT! I SHOOT! I SHOOT! I SHOOT!"
<Faceless> Close.
<Faceless> "I brace to shoot! I whine! I shoot! I moan! I shoot! I complain! I shoot!"
* Rez hates you.
---
Rez attempts to block the Jotun's fifteen metre club and shatter it, promptly fails:
<Faceless> <Rez> Um, Ekim? I broke my sword again.
<Faceless> Obviously, this world is filled with great political intrigue.
<Faceless> <Kevin> So, who's a traitor?
<DreadRelm> Loaded, huh?
<DreadRelm> ^^
<Faceless> *Birds chirp.
<Faceless> <Kevin> No one?
<Faceless> *Lammermore raises his hand slowly.
<Faceless> <Lammermore> I guess I could be, if it helps.
<Faceless> <Kevin> Okay, yeah. That would be great. D'you mind?
<Faceless> <Lammermore> No prob. So, maniacal laugh now?
<Faceless> <Radagast> That is traditional, yes.
<Faceless> <Lammermore> Gotcha. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH-HO-HO-HO-HO-HO!
<@Brian> Actually, Lammermore should mention that he blew his chance to get the sword, first, and could be please have a do-over.
* Faceless wonders if it is time to accuse Col. Mustard.
<@Dracos> YES
<DreadRelm> <Faceless> . . . in the billiard room.
<DreadRelm> <Kevin> "The what?"
<DreadRelm> <Faceless> Er. Kitchen. KITCHEN.
[22:36] <Rez> Hey, Faceless, did you hear the joke about the Canadian, the American, and the Australian?
Dracos
<Astryd> So, we can prove our innocence.
<Devin> Yeah. Should we do it?
<Ginrai> This looks like a good time to change the subject. Hey, Bjorn!
<Rez> And they have a million orcs!
<Roger> What?
<Rez> Er. A thousand thousands of orcs.
<Roger> Ah. That'd be a lot.
<Erik> Really? I thought that was many.
<Alec> No, no, it's many many lots!
<Roger> Get away.
<Alec> Count 'em yourself. One, two, many, lots, many lots...
* Erik smacks Alec.
<Erik> Shut up, you, with your fancy book-learning.
<Rez> ...
Quote"On second thought," Bjorn says, turning away from the forge, "Let's go find Lammermore. He doesn't deserve the sword he's got, the bastard. I'll defeat him with groin-fu, and then we're all set."
He pauses. "Unless, of course, you'd rather do the deed," he offers. "Because my groin-fu is way mad cool."
Ceci n'est pas un poste.
<@Dracos> Ideas anyone?
<Stormriders> We're all going to die!
Chanserv sets mode +m.
<@Dracos> Anyone at all?
<+Rez>Well we could go to the temples.
<@Dracos> Sounds like a plan! Let's go!
Dracos
is lame
[20:53] <Ginrai> post
[20:53] * Ginrai wonders how long it'll take for his plan to backfire
[20:53] <@Brian> Ginrai: Post.
[20:54] <@Brian> Ginrai: We'll enter combat time here.
<Rez> I did something stupid. Sorry.
<Dracos> *baps* Don't do it again. Now, let's see... I'll question him.
<Rez> I did something stupid again.
<Dracos> ....
<Rez> :D
Dracos
EDIT REZ: Added the last line. For, you know, clarity.
* Faceless suggest that the butch bull-dyke Lorekeeper marm burst into Serril's chambers, and tell all those slacking no-good lazy-ass Lorekeepers that if they don't get their butts in gear and get some combat spells ready to go, Dean Kevin is going to cut funding for the Sigma Masta Beta Lorekeepers, he is *not* kidding.
* Faceless does wonder about the other dreams.
<Faceless> At a guess, they'll be different genres.
* Rez doesn't know what the Ayer's Rock level is going to be, buuuuuuttttttt . . .
<@Dracos> It's going to be fallout.
<Faceless> Something post-apocalyptic, almost certainly. >.<
<Faceless> OooooooooooOOoooOOoooOOooOOooooo.
<Faceless> Maybe Army of Darkness.
<Faceless> That'd be cool.
<Faceless> * Rez brandishes an assault rifle.
<Faceless> <Rez> This is my BOOM-STICK!
<Faceless> * Bjorn brandishes Shinmyouken.
<Faceless> <Bjorn> This is my INVISIBLE SWORD!
<Faceless> * Birds chirp.
<Faceless> <Bjorn> Maybe I should go out and start over again.
<Dracos> *HEADBUTT OF DOOM!*
<OgreGeneral> Was that supposed to hurt?
<Dracos> Oh look at the birdies...
Dracos
*is not funny*
Closing his eyes, Ginrai tries to concentrate on his lead pipe to see if he can make it appear in his hand.
Ginrai concentrates harder, imagining the texture and feel of the pipe.
--
Sorry, Gin, but a knife is just -not your weapon-. ;)
<@Rez> So, Alec, where'd you get your new axe?
<+Alec> It, er . . . fell off the back of a wagon.
<@Rez> . . .
<+Alec> I tried to give it back but they just didn't seem interested, and it was so shiny! I couldn't just leave it there!
<@Rez> . . .
<+Alec> You did it.
<@Rez> . . .
* Rez sets mode: -v Alec
* Rez sends Alec to go and stand in the corner.
Carthrat:
<Arthur> "It's strength like that.. we find heroes in.
<Arthur> "Ah, not that an ancestor's will should go unrespected, Sir."
<Arthurt> "If you say he's not a hero, that's fine with me."
<Relm> That's because you're just not manly enough to move under such a burden.
* Faceless eyes the steroid-abuser.
* Relm eyes Shorty.
<Faceless> Perhaps I will take my masuclinity advice from someone not at increased risk of sterility.
<Relm> And perhaps I will take my masculinity advice from someone whose inability to keep it in their pants is causing the downfall of human civilization as we know it. :D
<Relm> So!
<Relm> Bjorn!
<Relm> What kinda advice have you got for me?
<Faceless> Brian: Just to confirm, I have a distinct absence (0) of monetary funds, right?
<@Brian> Yes.
<Faceless> Buh.
<@Brian> Huitzil has money.
<@Brian> I think Rez and Dracos do, as well.
<@Brian> But you and Ginrai are/were both broke.
<@Brian> This is easy to deal with, though.
<@Brian> Just abuse your position of authority.
<@Brian> <Bjorn> "You! Guard! I demand that you enter the treasury, and bring me ... a single copper piece."
<@Brian> <Guard> "But, but sir--"
<@Brian> <Bjorn> "No questions! Fetch me my riches!"
<@Brian> <Guard> "Yes, but--"
<@Brian> <Bjorn> "Run, fool! Bring it!"
<@Brian> <Guard> "Okay ... but you get paid way more than that."
<@Brian> I need to create a 'number of times player moved to call GM names' stat for the random stats.
<Rez> As a serious question, though, what kinds of tools do you have that could help us against the dreadmarch?
<Liandral> Weapons. Lots of weapons.
<Rez> Well, that's just kick-ass, Neo. Too bad about the whole "pansy-ass elf" thing, isn't it?
<Dracos>"Doesn't that...hurt?"
<Liandril>"Naw, I didn't really need those organs anyway."
Dracos
<Alec> You come from another world?
<Rez> Not just that . . . on my world, I am ALSO a mighty warrior!
* Bjorn ignores Rez in favor of evaluating Alec and Mirallia's reactions.
* Rez is now known as CodeWarriorRezantis
<CodeWarriorRezantis> COWER, MORTALS!
<GM>SIEGE!
<Players>PLOT!
<GM>But...siege?
<Players>PLOT FIRST!
<GM> Siege now?
<Players> No. Go sit in a corner and write more plot.
Dracos
As it happened?
Quote from: "Brian"Liandral grunts, still not entirely consious, and struggles weakly. The glow of light from the priestess's hands brightens, and seems to soothe him ... when she's done, his hand is still gone, but the wounds are healed. "How did this happen?" she asks, looking around.
"You know what?" Bjorn says, wearily, drawing a hand across his forehead. "Fuck it. I'll tell you how it happened. It happened because he's a dumbshit. 'Oh, I'm big and tough!'" he singsongs mockingly. "'Dur, I'll stick weapons in my body and bring them along! After all, what are the odds I'll get stuck in some pansy-ass elf body that folds in half when somebody sneezes too hard?'
"That's right!" he proclaims, throwing his arms wide. "Liandral is actually from another fucking world, trapped in your Liandral's body. I'm the same! And so is Bloom, Shuker, Durant, Lindsey, Serril, and Parthipan." He points at each in turn, just so no one can mistake him. "I'd pause so you can exclaim in confusion, but you all knew that already, didn't you? Hell, I started getting 'Welcome to the Neighbourhood' cards yesterday. So fuck it. I'm tired of trying to hide it. I mean, I was seriously considering trying to cover up his fuck-up," jerking a thumb dismissively at Liandral, "and hell, we're not even working together. And you know what? It ain't worth this much effort. You are all primitive little monkeys with the cultural and technlogical sophistication of barnacles. I would kill all of you without a second thought, except that it turns out that, because somebody up there has a big honking sense of irony, we have to clean up your mess." He pauses thoughtfully for a second. "Okay, in fairness, the mess was started by a group from our world. They got here, so they got the job of fucking you all over -- a job, I'd like to add after a couple weeks of working with you, that sounds pretty damn sweet."
He waggles a finger reprovingly at Kevin, who'd looked like he was about to start speaking. "Ah-ah-ah!" he admonishes. "Monkey doesn't talk, monkey
listens. We're here to fix things. So, all of you shut up and listen, and if you're good obedient little savages, maybe we'll get out of this intact, okay?"
Crossing his arms, he looks out over the crowd. "First things first. We kill all the elves. We don't
like elves, pointy-eared little sneaking things. Second, Ekim, get over here and smack me with your hammer. Goddamnit, it's time for a power-up. Thirdly, go invent gunpowder." He looks around and frowns. "Well? What the hell are you waiting for?"
<Dracos> Not your day, Slimy Lizard!
Ah, no, wait. My mad. This isn't the thread for scenes that should be deleted, is it?
Slimey. Slime[/u]y. My logs are very clear on this point. :)
[03:43] <Brian> <Bjorn> So, apparently, your 'sinning' really was almost enough to let Hammar escape from his crystal.
[03:43] <Brian> <Mirallia> I... see.
[03:44] <Brian> <Bjorn> I have to free him to win.
[03:44] <Brian> <Mirallia> Okay.
[03:44] <Brian> <Bjorn> I just want you to think about the implications of that.
[03:44] <Brian> <Mirallia> ....
You don't get to decide when it's been 15+ days since a deleted scene.
Dracos
[22:33] <Brian> <Other_PCs> You know, Gin, about your participation....
[22:34] <Brian> <Non-PC_Observers> ...actually, you should try to be more active in the game.
[22:34] <Brian> <Ginrai> Okay.
[22:34] <Brian> <Brian> Very well! Have a plot hook, and neat stuff going on.
[22:34] <Brian> <Ginrai> Looks like a good spot for a break!
[22:34] <Brian> <Brian> But ... I ... you ... the .... ;.;
Yeah, smack me for abuse of this thread, but maybe in having it permanently there it'll help remind.
Dracos
<@Bjorn> You know, though, it'd be kind of fun to be sent down to the Archonae city.
<@Bjorn> <Bjorn> Your crystals or your life!
<@Bjorn> <Archon> Wait. Don't I know you?
<@Bjorn> <Bjorn> Uh....
<@Bjorn> <Archon> Yeah, you! I remember! I played Bowl The Vassal with you!
<@Bjorn> <Bjorn> No, no, you're thinking of someone else. We're very interchangeable.
<OkibiOhki> <Faceless> "Okay. We know what needs to be done. Who can do it?"
<OkibiOhki> <Dracos> "Durant?"
<OkibiOhki> <Lammermore> "Who that is not locked away for being an assasin king, rather."
<OkibiOhki> <Faceless> "Anyone?"
<OkibiOhki> * Kevin shakes his head.
<OkibiOhki> <Faceless> "DAMNIT, Kevin! Why don't you have keep-ninjas?"
<Dracos>I think we should kill everyone.
<Rez> No. Bad Dracos.
<Dracos> Not even one?
<Rez> Not even one.
<Dracos> Can I at least gnaw on them a bit?
<Rez> NO!
Dracos
Player One, You May Continue This Game . . .
<Rez> Hey, Bjorn.
<Bjorn> What's up?
<Rez> <IC> whine whine whine, bitch bitch, sorry the insult was meant for Ginrai, but nonetheless you're a psycho and you're scaring me, whine whine whine, complain, brace, shoot shoot shoot, unbrace, whine.</IC>
<Bjorn> <IC> Yeah, sorry, the whole "lives of billions resting on us" thing was getting to me, but man, I became, like, a GOD, man, and I like, saw, y'know, things and there was peace and love and harmony and I'm all better now m'kay? Hugs and kisses, give you cookies later, XOXOXOXOX.</IC>
<Rez> Conversation synopsized.
* Rez wanders off to get lunch.
<Postbot> Bjorn has posted to DVD Bonus Features -- Deleted Scenes http://www.pishoque.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=53307#53307
<Rez> Bitch.
* Bjorn snickers.
Shairthewm: The day before the day after tomorrow was held on the morning before the yesterday of all our dreams?
FacelessSeiryo: Today is the day after the day before the day after the day after tomorrow.
Shairthewm: Recursively releasing today is the day after tomorrow?
Your mind will hurt too. =P
Dracos
Is bad.
The Original Pitch, revised for all!
For Drac, it went like this...
[02:44] <Dracos> I think it was more like this.
[02:44] <Dracos> Brian: Game?
[02:44] <Dracos> Dracos: Game?
[02:44] <Dracos> Brian: Here's little story.
[02:44] <Dracos> Dracos: Cool.
[02:44] <Dracos> Brian: Game it?
[02:44] <Dracos> Dracos: GAME ON!
For Bjorn, it went like this...
[02:48] <Bjorn> <Brian> Hey, Bjorn. I'm starting a game. It's about...
[02:48] <Bjorn> <Bjorn> I'm in.
[02:48] <Bjorn> <Brian> ... Cool.
For Eb, Hal, and Rat, it went like this...
<Bjorn> THERE IS SPOT OPEN IN THIS AWESOME GAME WHOAMG.
<Ebiris> I'm in!
<Halbarad> No, I'm in!
<C-Rat> $%@^ I said it first!
<Brian> Hmm. We shall have them fight to the DEATH. ONLY ONE MAY SURVIVE.
<Trio-Of-N00bs> RAAAAAARGH! Crush! Kill!
Carthrat (1:42:21 AM): /me could so beat Bjorn, Rez, Drac and Gin and tDaTCraft. *nodses*
Carthrat (1:42:27 AM): Dreadrush their asses harsh.
I think we have a challenge!
Quote from: "Halbarad"Carthrat (1:42:21 AM): /me could so beat Bjorn, Rez, Drac and Gin and tDaTCraft. *nodses*
Carthrat (1:42:27 AM): Dreadrush their asses harsh.
I think we have a challenge!
I'd like to point out that our turtling strategy is working quite well.
Creep/Counter beats turtling. I won't give you free XP! :D
Well, we've already demonstrated our abilities to counter a Dreadrush.
Your creep/counter will be swarmed under by us, as we outnumber you four to one!
Not to worry. My micro is just *that good* to deal with you.
The invicible hero helps, too. :D
EXPLOITSCHEATSOMGNERFPALADINS
<Halbarad> TAUNT the RODENT!
<Bjorn> Ahhh, that good ol' party dynamic.
<Bjorn> Hal taunting Rat, Rez and Drac taunting each other, me threatening to beat Unseen up, me yelling at everyone, really....
* Bjorn sniffles a little.
<Bjorn> You're all like *family*!
* Halbarad goes to deal with exploding houses.
Doesn't that just say it all?
[00:49] <Brian> I wonder if this will steal Rez back from WoW. :)
[00:49] <Rez> That's a good question.
[00:49] <Rez> To be honest, Brian . . .
[00:49] <Rez> TDAT > WoW.
[00:49] <Rez> *nodnodnod*
[00:49] <Halbarad> tDaT is just that level of awesome.
"A soda, please," Bjorn replies. "We have some information to add -- the names of three of the Pax Arcana five, if you don't have that, at the very least." He sighs. "And... Paul is dead."
Victor grimaces. "That's ... wait. I smell blood on you. His blood on that bracelet, in fa--" His eyes widen, and then narrow in suspicion. "No way, I'm not taking the fall for this one. Uncool, dude -- you killed your own Dreamer, this time."
More correctly, we lost both dreamers to their own big mouths.
Hal, please don't speak. We're going to get in trouble with the Union if this keeps up.
...! ;_;
<Bigfire> Injoke!
<Homecrew> Obscure injoke!
<Bigfire> Ridiculously obscure injoke!
<Homecrew> UTTER AND COMPLETE GIBBERISH
<Brotherhood of Morpheus> ... Screw this, we're going on vacation.
<Dracos> But we're just getting started.
<C-Rat> Private angst, as it were.
<C-Rat> Carefully swept behind the curtain.
<Halbarad> As long as it's not corporal angst.
* Halbarad ducks.
<Bjorn> So, what did we miss? We get any new allies?
<Relm> As a matter of fact, you did!
<Bjorn> Tell us about them! Did they kill any dragons yet? You're an oracle, so you must have known that we'd only accept applicants who've slain dragons.
<GM> ELSEWHERE!
<Alan> Oh, and, uh, I'll need you to slay a dragon for us, too....
<Halbarad> Now, let's go off and rescue Pandora!
<Ebiris> Wait one second.
* Game is being saved... do not remove memory card from the Dream...
* Game is saved!
<Ebiris> Okay, let's rock!
Quote
"A few hours was never going to equate to much. He just wanted to gloat. Fuck."
Rez takes another cookie.
...
<Rez> Bjorn . . .
<Rez> Haven't we pointed out that the thread isn't for scenes that SHOULD have been deleted?
<Bjorn> Yes.
<Bjorn> This is true.
<Bjorn> The scene that is deleted is the one where I stare at you, and then smack you upside the head.
<Rez> Feel free. :D
<Postbot> Bjorn has posted to DVD Bonus Features -- Deleted Scenes http://www.pishoque.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=54578#54578
<Bjorn> Okay. :D
<OkibiOhki> <Relm> Danger! Wake up!
<OkibiOhki> <Bjorn> CRAP! ALARM! RUN!
<OkibiOhki> <Ginrai> ...wonder if they got any fruit loops....
<Dracos> I'm working under a few simple premises:
<Dracos> A)This is our home ground and there's plenty of firepower if necessary
<Dracos> B)We've been told that these are, in fact, salvagable allys and so far those Relm has dubbed ally have sort of just very nicely gone along with the claim.
<Bjorn> Allies.
<Dracos> Yeah
<Bjorn> And how many people has Relm dubbed allies?
<Dracos> I forget.
<Dracos> =D
And boredom sets in...
[21:27] <Halbarad> roll 1dBrian
[21:27] * Hatbot --> "Halbarad rolls 1dBrian and gets Error: Number of sides must be integer greater than 0."
[21:28] <Halbarad> So Brian is non-integral?
[21:28] <Bjorn> Brian is real, yo.
[21:28] <Halbarad> Is he irrational?
[21:29] <Bjorn> Nah, dude. He's just so complex that he's misunderstood.
[21:29] <Halbarad> You know we both need to be shot for this.
[21:29] <Bjorn> It would only be rational.
[21:29] * Halbarad shoots Bjorn.
[21:29] <Bjorn> Yeah, like that.
<Halbarad> I can see a dash of paranoia being very healthy.
<Dreamcrew> Oh, no, we've seen where this goes before. Relm, can we trade him in for a new one?
<Relm> No, no, no. Your dreamer has *three lives*.
<Brian> "There's a madman in front of you with green eyes."
<Dracos> "No, no. I have blue eyes."
<Brian> "I said you had green eyes."
<Dracos> "I-I wrote it down on my character sheet. I have blue eyes."
<Brian> "You have green eyes (http://www.pishoque.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=28545#28545). Did you forget?"
<Dracos> ";_;"
<Brian> "Don't you mean ';_;'?"
<GM> *large chunk of story*
<Dracos> Neat.
<GM> what? Just neat?! ;_;
<Dracos> Super neat?
Dracos
The really sad part is one week later, when:
<Dracos> hum
<Dracos> "<story>?"
<Dracos> Do we know that?
Mocking my memory for fine details. Cold ;_;
[18:13] <OkibiOhki> NOW BEGINS THE STORM!
[18:13] * OkibiOhki leaps upon the raging main and unleashes its fury upon Bjornistan.
Dracos
[03:18 PM] <Dracos> damn too slow
[03:34 PM] <Bjorn> Yes, you are.
[03:34 PM] <Bjorn> Slow like SUCK!
[03:34 PM] <Dracos> >_>
[03:35 PM] <Dracos> 16 minutes later, huh?
[03:35 PM] <Bjorn> Shut up.
<Dracos> Post rush, kekekekeke.
<Brian> Wait.
<Dracos> Huh?
<Brian> DESCIOPOST~!
<Dracos> Woah.
Dracos
Dracos: Tomorrow, I fly out. While I'm free to play today and probably tomorrow morning, afterwards you can NPC me?
Brian: <Dracos> Whirrr......*beep* Killination beginning.
Dracos: perfect
"I think that's a cue," Bjorn muses, rising to his feet. "It all started on a dark and stormy night.... or, rather, it didn't. It started on a cold and snowy day, and this is, what, the one-fifth mark?"
He ponders that, hand on the doorknob. "Insufficient literary appeal," he pronounces. "Anyways, night all."
Dracos
<OkibiOhki> Ginrai.
<OkibiOhki> Your post.
<Bjorn> That sounds like the beginning of a rap song!
* Bjorn puts his cap on backwards and begins busting out some phat beats!
<OkibiOhki> Noticably, F.A.T., lay me down a funky beat.
<OkibiOhki> Ginrai (Ginrai!) it's your post!
<Bjorn> Buh-b-b-b-wokka-chch-chch-bam!
<OkibiOhki> Better do it quick, or your rear is toast!
<Bjorn> Buh-b-b-b-wokka-chch-chch-bam!
* OkibiOhki attempts a quadruple head-spin.
<Bjorn> Nine! One! One!
<OkibiOhki> x_x
[14:52] <OkibiOhki> <Dracos> I got my eyes torn out just to get a color change. You know what that makes me?
[14:53] <OkibiOhki> <Bjorn> Someone who likes to do things the hard way? Check it out -- I can turn my eyes into smoke!
[14:53] <OkibiOhki> <Dracos> Screw that -- I'm HARDcore.
[14:53] <OkibiOhki> <Bjorn> S...MOKIN'!
[14:53] <OkibiOhki> <Dracos> DAMN YOU!
Dracos
<Bjorn> I was about to say "I've forgotten who I had as anchors in the Waking Dream," but I think it's on the wiki!
<Brian> The only ones I'd worry about were any badguys.
<Brian> I don't think you have any. Except possibly Jessica, and it occurs to me you shouldn't, or else you would have tried it by now.
<Bjorn> http://www.rpgdl.com/wiki/index.php?title=Waking_Dream
<Bjorn> Whooha!
<Brian> There you have it.
<Bjorn> I've got Lindsey.
<Brian> Vanessa and Mark Smith.
<Bjorn> And Liandral.
<Bjorn> I also have Mirallia.
<Bjorn> I'm not sure how that works.
<Brian> Bjorn: "Mirallia.... Mirallia...."
<Brian> Otherself: "Dude, we're trying to have a moment. Do you mind?"
<Brian> Bjorn: "...."
<Brian> Bjorn: STOP TRYING TO END REALITY AGAIN, DAMMIT.
* Dracos arrives in California.
<Dracos> Okay, let's go rescue Bjorn. Bjorn? Yo? There?
* Bjorn-AFK has been idle for 8 months, 13 days, 2 hours.
<Brian> Hey, let's go hang out.
<Dracos> Aren't you supposed to be deceased?
<Rez> So I gather Carthrat and Hal are replacing Ginrai and Huitz~?
<Bjorn> Yep.
*Rez feels vaguely against the interlopers.
<Rez> What happens if we get 'em killed?
<Rez> Can we get more?
<Rez> :D
<Bjorn> I'm pretty sure at some point Relm will start refusing to give us more Dreamers.
<Rez> Oh come on
<Rez> We have five billion potentials left
<Bjorn> Yeah, but we don't have to go through them one-by-one.
<Halbarad> Who am I going to wind up with in the Earth Dream, anyway?
<Bjorn> Probably Mirallia.
<Bjorn> That'll be weird.
<Halbarad> ...
<Bjorn> There is no Brian but the Brian, and Rez is his prophet!
<Rez> I am?
<Bjorn> Yeah, he's not very lucky.
<Rez> It could be worse.
<Bjorn> Shade could be his prophet.
<Rez> Indeed.
<Halbarad> ...
<Bjorn> <Brian> So, I think you should all be nice to each other.
<Bjorn> <Shade> If you smile at each other WOLVES WILL DESCEND FROM THE HEAVENS AND EAT YOUR TESTICLES
<Rez> * Brian throws a heavy stone tablet at Shade.
[00:16] <OkibiOhki> <Bjorn> Let's regroup.
[00:16] <OkibiOhki> <C-rat> That's cool. I'm gonna ... scout out our target.
[00:16] <OkibiOhki> <Bjorn> You mean the brothel.
[00:17] <OkibiOhki> <C-rat> Yeah. By the way, do you have, uh, say, 10,000 yen to spare, or so?
<Bjorn> Plan! I is on team A!
<Rez> Agreeing with plan! I is on team B!
[-System-] You may not leave this screen until you assign your NPCs to parties.
<Dracos> Don't they just teleport away when rotated out of the active party? ;_;
<NPCs> ....
Quote from: "Dracos"
"What a dull temple," Dracos commented, meandering in the public area and taking heed of anything suspicious about the design or structure that might hint at passage entryways, obvious or not.
<Dracos> Hey, I may not know much, but the last religion I saw had enslaved gods and regular apocalyptic wars. Meet the standards, people!
<Alveria> Can we speak privately through the dream?
<Bjorn> Through me.
<Bjorn> Yes. I don't have to connect everyone.
<Brian> <Bjorn> Welcome to Bjorn.net
<Brian> <Huitzil> Awesome. How do I set up an m-serv?
<Brian> <Rezantis> Hey, can we get some LAN gaming going on here?
<Brian> <Bjorn> Hates you all.
<Bjorn> Awww.
<Bjorn> You have prevented what would have been one of the most awesome moments in the game. ;.;
<Brian> Which is...?
<Brian> Rez whipping out the Ancestral Buster Sword and cleaving a man in half?
<Bjorn> Rez backhanding the mouthy yak with Ancestral Buster Sword outta nowhe... yeah.
<Brian> Now, granted, you probably WILL be able to do this the next time.
<Brian> But....
<Brian> Fuck. Who would fight you after seeing your, 'pull swords out of fucking nowhere, cleave apparent leader-in-half, then look for more meat' approach?
<Bjorn> Someone worth fighting?
<Brian> ...true.
<Brian> True.
<Brian> You make a profound point.
<Brian> Excuse me while some villains gain CP.
<Bjorn> I find the logic in our actions amusing.
<Bjorn> <Drac> I am going to use the Earth Totem to awe everyone with my incredible strength.
<Bjorn> <Rez> I am not going to use the Earth Totem so I don't kill this guy.
<Bjorn> <Bjorn> I am not going to use the Earth Totem because I am tired of breaking weapons.
<Dracos> Ah, but I have no weapons to break!
<Dracos> except for my own fists
<Dracos> which well
<Dracos> if either my fists or arms explode with this action
<Dracos> I'm totally giving sad puppy eyes.
<Dracos> ;_;
<Bjorn> cf Ogres and headbutting thereof.
<Halbarad> On a side note, I think a riot shield would be a very good Dream-item to develop ASAP.
<Bjorn> Oh, pfft.
<Bjorn> A riot shield wouldn't have kept *either* of our last two Dreamers alive.
<Halbarad> No, because they both suffered from terminal idiocy.
<Bjorn> I'm just saying.
<Bjorn> If you're working on the theory that being a Dreamer makes you likely to die, you should invest in a Dream-gag, not a Dream-shield.
<Halbarad> <_<
[10:21] < Postbot> Bjorn has posted to DVD Bonus Features -- Deleted Scenes http://www.soulriders.org/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=1001306#1001306
[10:22] < Relm> Bwahaha
[10:22] < Relm> I love it
[10:28] <@Yukari-sama> I DO NOT HAVE TERMINAL IDIOCY.
[10:28] <@Yukari-sama> That's RAT'S niche.
[10:32] < Relm> I think the dream-gag is a brilliant concept.
[10:33] <@Yukari-sama> For other people, certainly.
<Rez> "Bjorn turns and stares at Philip for a long second, and then shakes his head."
<Bjorn> What'd he do?
<Rez> Nothing really!
<Bjorn> I think that's a lie.
<Rez> Actually it wasn't anything particularly.
<Rez> It just amused me.
<Rez> Because I remember that happening a lot.
<Bjorn> Yeah, more or less.
<Bjorn> Though it will happen less from now on.
<Bjorn> That was when I was Serious and Drac was Flippant.
<Bjorn> Now I am Creepily Homicidal and Drac is Getting Worried.
<Rez> And I'm starting fights.
<Rez> It's Role Reversal Day
<Rez> In the first act it was YOU starting fights and DRAC creepily homicidal and ME getting worried.
<YakuzaBoss> "I don't suppose money will solve this problem?"
<Rezantis> "Tell us everything you know about-"
*Carthrat shoots the YakuzaGuard for 15 damage.
*Carthrat killed a YakuzaGuard!
*Carthrat gains 5 CP!
<Halbarad> "You got any more of these guys? SOME of us need to level."
<Bjorn> So.
<Rez> So.
<Bjorn> Should I skip straight to the intimidating yakuza part again?
<Rez> No. We start off polite this time. >_>
<Bjorn> Bah.
<Rez> Let's lay down the rules now
<Rez> We start off polite
<Rez> They're allowed to offend any single one of us once
<Rez> And we stay polite.
<Bjorn> Objection!
<Rez> After that, fuck it, you can intimidate them or we flip out and kill them, I don't care.
<Bjorn> I wanna kill at first offense.
<Rez> Nuh-uh. Second offence.
<Bjorn> ;.;
<Rez> They get one on the off chance it was accidental.
<Rez> Are you agreeable to this plan?
<Bjorn> Can I politely tell them "that was your last chance, if you offend me again your ancestors will find your guts in their bed and be so put off they fail to procreate?"
<Rez> If you can put some kind of platitude, like a please or thank you in there, to make it a little more polite then sure.
*Rez would consider that an acceptable compromise.
<Bjorn> 'kthx lol'
<Rez> Close enough.
<Bjorn> <Hathoway> What else do you remember?
<Bjorn> <Specter> Where to begin?
<Bjorn> <Rez> I DON'T KNOW! THAT'S YOUR DAMN JOB!
<Bjorn> Rez!
<Bjorn> Look for carts!
<Bjorn> When you are being interrogated by unpleasant scientists to determine if you are crazy or have powers, CARTS ARE KEY.
* Rez is tied to a chair.
<Rez> That said if they start trying to zap me we're gonna see what 28 STR can do.
<Bjorn> I was handcuffed.
<Bjorn> Details!
<@GM> Oh, man.
<@GM> Another pissing contest, this time centered around being an inmate at an asylum?
<@GM> <Bjorn> Psychotic killers.
<@GM> <Rez> Victorian era. You know, they used enemas for EVERYTHING back then?
<@GM> <Bjorn> You win.
* Rez cringes.
<Rez> Yeah, I'm going to see if I - unlike Bjorn - can leave without killing anyone.
<Bjorn> Whoa, hey.
<Bjorn> I wasn't responsible for the majority of either the deaths or the property-damage in the Workshop.
<Bjorn> I'm not trying to engage in a pissing contest, I'm just passing on hard-earned advice.
<Bjorn> I mean, he's established there are no women there, so my other key piece of advice, "find an autistic child to make you a shiv out of glass," is not entirely applicable.
<Rez> It's got the words 'depraved', 'decapitated' and 'goat'. How can you go wrong?
<@Brian> <Bjorn> Crazy witch-doctor. Kinda cool. You guys?
<@Brian> <Dracos> Heretic priest being hunted for death.
<@Brian> <Carthrat> Freaking slave! How weak is that?
<@Brian> <Rezantis> Inmate at a Victorian-era asylum.
<@Brian> <Halbarad> I won a round of poker and finished my apprenticeship!
<@Brian> <Everyone but Hal> ....
<@Halbarad> ;_;
<@Brian> <Halbarad> What?
<@Brian> <Halbarad> Did I mention that apparently I've also got a date?
<@Halbarad> <Bjorn> Ah, so YOUR pants will end reality this time.
<@Bjorn>: Awww, jesus.
<@Bjorn>: I'm a *midget*.
<@Bjorn>: Or the Templar is huge.
<@Halbarad>: >_>
<@Halbarad>: *snickers*
<@Halbarad>: ...
<@Halbarad>: .......
<@Halbarad>: BAAAAhAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<@Halbarad>: You're Tingle.
<@Bjorn>: ...
<@Bjorn>: I have dark skin!
<@Bjorn>: And I talk to spirits, not fairies.
<@Bjorn>: And I got no map pieces.
<@Halbarad>: Minor point of difference.
<@Bjorn>: Also, I would like to add: shut up.
* Brian shakes his head.
<Brian> Bjorn, I need a roll.
<Bjorn> roll 3d6
* Hatbot --> "Bjorn rolls 3d6 and gets 3." [3d6=1, 1, 1
<Bjorn> :D
<Brian> Jesus.
<Bjorn> Hatbot, do ya love me?
<Hatbot> Don't count on it, Bjorn.
<Bjorn> Hatbot, do you like dislike Templars?
<Hatbot> Without a doubt, Bjorn.
<Brian> Explains so much.
<Brian> <Bjorn> Bluff.
<Brian> <Brian> NPC confusion.
<Brian> <Bjorn> Bluff!
<Brian> <Brian> Roll!
<Brian> <Hatbot> Total bluff.
<Brian> <Brian> ...bluff.
<Brian> And, anyway, by now shouldn't you be carrying around phamplets?
<Bjorn> For which of my many, many regularly confusing issues?
<Brian> "Meta-humanity and YOU: Why sometimes the world's saviors may act like dicks"?
<Bjorn> Oh, that one.
<Bjorn> I just need a warning label. "If product treats you with lack of respect, ask for clarification and do not take personally unless prescribed by a doctor."
09:58 < Rez> <Halbarad> Not so much for the 'doing actual work' thing but more for the 'okay, what happened that I'm having to hide' thing.
09:58 < Rez> Somebody burned your house down!
09:59 <@Halbarad> Yeah, but WHY.
10:00 <@Halbarad> And do people still want to set me on fire?
10:00 <@Halbarad> Aside from Bjorn.
10:00 <@Halbarad> He's kind of a given.
10:46 <Halbarad> Also, I find it so very amusing that the pompous head machinist guy is named Balmer.
10;48 <Bjorn> Yeah, well, if the head of your guild is Gates, the royalty thing will be balanced out. :P
10:56 <Halbarad> The whole DREAM is about Gates.
10:57 <Bjorn> I feel vaguely dirty now.
<Dracos> Who ya gonna call?
<Bjorn> The Ghost Summoner is Away from his Desk... please leave a message after the beep.
<Halbarad> This is pretty clearly not my girlfriend.
<Bjorn> You hope.
<Halbarad> Well.
<Halbarad> Hm.
<Bjorn> I mean, you *are* nobility.
<Bjorn> Different standards and all.
<Halbarad> I hate you and wish for your painful and protracted death.
<Halbarad> I would hate to see you end up in a mad scientist role in the wind or water dreams.
<Bjorn> Aw man, that would be awesome.
<Bjorn> "Tonight... WE SHALL CREATE LIFE! After engaging the public in a bioethics discourse, of course, in which we shall fully explore the ethical and legal ramifications of our actions."
* Halbarad snickers.
<Bjorn> Of course, if I was a good scientist, I'd be getting consent forms for the people I hit in the face.
<Halbarad> ...I can so see voodoo midget Bjorn handing those out.
<Bjorn> Of course, voodoo midget Bjorn *can't* punch people in the face.
<Bjorn> I'm not sure I need ethical consent forms for knee-cappings.
<Halbarad> "Yes, this is a release form saying that you're aware that I have sharp stabby objects and that you release me from any responsibility for any injuries that may result from this state of affairs."
<Bjorn> "In this study you will be subjected to prodding with sharp objects. Possible side effects include, but are not limited to, discomfort, aches, and bleeding. If you express a desire to end your participation, the experimenter will recognize this and end the experience."
<@Shamal> http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/south_yorkshire/6714863.stm
<@Shamal> I should get Laika some of that.
<@Ko-brb> Yes.
<@Ko-brb> That is cool, Eb.
<Brian> S.W.A.T. armored police dogs.
<Brian> The tDaT crew is going to be delighted~!
<Bjorn> So, that's everything that happened.
<Dracos>...
<Carthrat>...
<Bjorn> Guys?
<Dracos>...
<Carthrat>...
<Bjorn> ...If you guys don't speak up, I'm adding you to the kneecapping experiment group.
<GM> Your airship is under attack.
<Bjorn> I summon a wind spirit to make a bargain!
* GM thinks, makes templates for force wall, invisibility, extra movement, etc.
<GM> It shows up. What do you ask it for?
<Bjorn> The P.A.
<GM> Right the.... What?
<Bjorn> "Okay, Monkeys, I know we've had this conversation before, but...."
<GM> O_O
[02:06] <Yukari-sama> Heyo, rodent.
[02:06] <Yukari-sama> Also thank you for asking questions in tDaT.
[02:07] * Yukari-sama wants to know this stuff as well but it would look -really- bad if I was the one to ask.
[02:07] <Carthrat> I think this is the reason for my existence.
[02:07] <Carthrat> To be... clueless.
[02:07] <Carthrat> ...
Bjorn: <Hal> Oh god oh god I don't wanna hafta talk.
[18:58] Bjorn: <Bjorn> Bah, *I* will do the talking! All DEFER to ME!
[18:58] Bjorn: <Holmes> To be fair, normally it is your sister that would do the speaking in such situations.
[18:59] Bjorn: <Hal> Oh god thank you.
[18:59] Bjorn: <King> So, Tim! How's it hangin'?
[18:59] Bjorn: <Hal> ...
[19:07] Yukari-sama: See, I have this problem that I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING AND NO ONE SEEMS TO WANT TO HELP ME REMEDY THAT SITUATION
[19:08] • Yukari-sama shall forthwith answer all questions with "cheese".
[19:08] Yukari-sama: Perhaps particular varieties of cheese if the situation calls for it.
[19:08] Yukari-sama: But I'm sticking to cheese.
[19:08] Bjorn: Oh, pttf.
[19:08] Bjorn: You know as much as the rest of us.
[19:08] Bjorn: Mind you, that doesn't contradict your statement.
[19:09] Bjorn: Still. Just be vague and get us in private.
[19:09] Yukari-sama: With the king, you mean?
[19:09] Bjorn: Then we mug the king and set up a puppet government.
[19:09] Bjorn: Eh, we can probably take Aleister too.
[19:09] Bjorn: And Nathan can seduce your sister.
[19:09] Yukari-sama: I don't know what to think of my sister dating Rez.
[19:11] Bjorn: Well, it's a pretty ol' fashioned sorta society, so they're likely not having sex yet.
[19:11] Bjorn: Just good ol' tonsil hockey at this point, I imagine.
[19:11] Yukari-sama: This entire conversation is going to be DS'ed, isn't it?
[19:12] Bjorn: Who do you think initiates, anyways?
[19:12] Bjorn: Catherine seems like a pretty gung-ho modern woman, frankly.
[19:12] Bjorn: (Yes.)
[19:12] Yukari-sama: She does, yes.
[19:13] Yukari-sama: ...
[19:13] Yukari-sama: Great, now I have a mental image of her wrestling Rez to the ground and about that point my mind goes on strike.
[19:13] Bjorn: NOW the conversation can be DSed.
[19:14] Yukari-sama: You, sir, suck.
<Dracos> So, it would be very inconvenient, if, persay, you were killed right in time to allow your cousin to dramatically take the throne in mourning and declare war on the responsible church? That would probably put a damper on the day, yes?
<Brian> You're not killing the child king, are you?
<Dracos> I'd like to roll to attack the child king. I'm borrowing the king's sword for it.
<Brian> Clearing his throat, the swarthy midget declared: "I will survive. As long as I know how to love, I'll always be alive."
<Brian> Into the screaming silence, he added, "Ritual blessing."
[21:19] • Yukari-sama listens.
[21:20] Yukari-sama: Since I can't really add much. =\
[21:20] Bjorn: Dude, my primary contribution has been, in short, "I am crazy."
[21:20] Bjorn: The standards for this conversation have been set low.
[22:32] Brian: <King> I want to know about things, PC.
[22:32] Brian: <PCs> That's.... Check with the other NPCs.
[22:32] Brian: <Other NPCs> Loads of unhelpful information!
[22:32] Brian: <PCs> ....
[22:32] Brian: <Bjorn> Stabbings now?
[22:33] Brian: <Dracos> Yes. Yes, stabbings now.
<Carthrat> I would like...
<Brian> Yes?
*Days pass..
<Carthrat> an ice cream cone.
<Brian> Huh? What conversation are you continuing?
<Dracos> I predict awesome energy curtains for the Gate.
<GM> It's a hunk of stone.
<Dracos> ...I predict HORRIFIC LETHAL CHALLENGES WITH LITTLE REWARD!
<GM> I can oblige you that.
<Dracos> >.<
<Humphrey> I will see you ruined. Your superiors will know of this. The council shall hear.
<Dracos> *Mindread* I don't think you understand the position you are in.
<Bjorn> *PRESENCE ATTACK* *MINDCRUSH*
<Dracos> We know you wet your pants in Mr. Fredrick's class when you were eleven years old.
<OkibiOhki> GM: Okay, now that you've read hours of background and know roughly where you are, you're going to spend the next few sessions social-fuing our way to find out who's got answers.
<OkibiOhki> Dracos: This guy seems likely. We twist his arm until he admits it's him.
<OkibiOhki> GM: But....
<OkibiOhki> Bjorn: Also, we MIND-CRUSH.
<OkibiOhki> GM: ...you weren't supposed to ... I mean ... the social-fu....
<OkibiOhki> Bjorn/Dracos: MIND-CRUSH!
<OkibiOhki> Okay, let's see some social combat.
<Dracos> *punches the guy in the face*
<OkibiOhki> He's totally not going to be your friend anymore.
<Dracos> *punches his friend in the face* Reconsider. Also spill.
<OkibiOhki> Okay, you know social-fu does not mean punch in the face?
<Dracos> *punches GM in the face*
<OkibiOhki> Not in the face!
Quote"Always good to see how the edge of science is developing," Dracos commented as he lead the way back out of the gates area.
Shouldn't that be 'idly'? If it weren't for the violence, I would think it was the IMPOSTOR!
Philip Bloom [11:17 AM]:
hmm.
/me ponders bjorn's mentality
Brian Randall [11:18 AM]:
That.
Will get you nowhere.
Trust me, I've tried.
Brian: I really thought that would be a surprise for later.
Post.
Now Holmes is looking at you funny.
Bjorn: Post back.
NPCs looking at me oddly?
Now I know I'm BACK IN THE GAME.
Bjorn: No kicking in doors.
Dracos: Aww...really?
Bjorn: *blows up door*
Dracos: Okay, that works. GENTLEMAN MAKE YOUR TIME! WE HAVE SET THEM UP THE BOMB! VIEWING IN FIVE MINUTES!
Rat/Rez: Wha...? Coming?!
Dracos: Alright! *rushes off, forgetting where he's going*
Brian: Hint: Don't kill the guards.
Philip: My, what kind of barbarian do you think I am. I can't believe you suggest for me to kill the guards.
Brian: I have established that they are harmless-
Guard one: sneeze
Drac: Reflexo-kill.
...so.... sigh
rezantis: I basically glare at the guy!
rezantis: And don't say anything!
rezantis: And just presume that I can stare hard enough that he'll work out that he hasn't given me my explanation!
rezantis: :D
Masamichi45: Note to self: Don't set NPCs up for dramatic exchanges anymore.
rezantis: Because it seems like the upper-class prickish thing Hathoway would do! >.>
Masamichi45: From now on, all villans only speak face-punchese.
rezantis: And if he doesn't get it, I'll condescend!
rezantis: :D
Masamichi45: Spoken like a true gentleman.
rezantis: I'm working on this IC thing.