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[01B] Chaos in the Plaza

Started by Merc, October 19, 2009, 02:41:07 PM

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Merc

<Merc> --- IC ---
<Merc> It's a fine autumn day in the city of Ferune, especially made so by the music, food and rambunctious atmosphere today, as the seasonal harvest festival is well on its way. Inns are packed as those from neighboring towns all converge within the city walls to celebrate a good year's crop. (More)
<Merc> Mind you, it looks like two rascals might not get to enjoy the festivities, as they sulk inside a small cell on the outskirts of the town center, perfectly hearing the noise outside, in fact having been awoken by it. Last night both had a run of bad luck and found themselves spending the night in their current residence. Cerisse, their current guard, is sitting nearby, writting on some papers.
* Jack lies back on his cot, arms folded behind his head, and with a beat up, dusty top hat covering his face.
<Aleph> "Oh, come ON.  All I had was a few beers!"  A tallish man with long, red hair kept out of his eyes by a headband, dressed mostly in olive, complained.  "Besides!  It's the festival!  Why the hell am I in here?"
<Merc> Cerisse looks up from her papers and sighs. "Ol' Armond was pissed at the mess you mess in his bar last night. Forget that, did you, Aleph? You're lucky he doesn't try to make you work it all off. Had a good night's sleep you two?"
<Jack> "I've slept in worse, believe me."
* Jack sits up
<Aleph> "Like hell I did." Aleph commented under his breath.  "I'm not exactly having fun knowing there's whoever knows what free amusements out there"
<Jack> "I'm sure she's just thrilled to be babysitting the two of us, instead of enjoying the festivities herself too."
<Aleph> "Then why doesn't she just let us go so all of us can?"  Perfect logic there, albeit disregardful of laws or job stability...
<Merc> Cerisse seems to grumble, herself. "Look, I'm not happy to be here either. I had a date lined up with Jayce Skydale, and then you two had to cause trouble."
<Jack> "It's a shame you have to miss it, not like we're going anywhere." Jack taps the bars of the cell
<Aleph> "Pffft.  That guy?  You know he's been sneaking off in the night to go with that girl who works in the merchant's district.  What was her name...Shari...or something of the such?"
<Merc> Cerisse scowls at Aleph's words and even turns fully around to stare at the duo. "He said he broke up with her!" she replies hotly before pausing. Narrowing her eyes... "Wait, where'd you hear that, anyhow?"
<Jack> "He spends all day in the pub. He's got better gossip than most housewives."
<Aleph> "You forget.  My 'job' around here is to watch things.  It gets boring, so I watch goings-on in the town as well, you know?  Pretty easy from a good vantage point.  Doubly so when you've been here your whole life and know everyone."
<Aleph> "And then, yeah.  When I'm not signed up for that and have money free," he smirks, "I'm usually in the bar."
<Merc> Cerisse continues to frown. "Jayce knows I'm stuck here..." she mutters to herself, before standing and walking closer to the cell. Pressing her finger against the bar, she comments, "Okay...Let's say I let you two troublemakers out...will you two, A, stay out of trouble, and B...help me find Jayce and see if he's up to something? You're not in really serious trouble, so I -could- let you out."
<Aleph> "Sure thing, sure thing." Aleph grins.
<Jack> "Sure thing. It's certainly better than sitting around."
<Merc> "No picking pockets or flipping up skirts, right?" She seems to be more focused on Aleph's potential wrongdoing, probably because he's a repeat offender, while Jack just happened to get unlucky once in all the time he's lived there.
<Jack> "Understood."
<Aleph> "Fine, fine." Aleph sat up, rolling his eyes.
<Aleph> "The second takes all the damn fun out of it, though," he complained under his breath.
<Merc> "...right then," Cerisse mutters as she goes back to her desk and messes around inside some of the drawers until she pulls out the keys, finally opening the door. "Remember, if you see Jayce, you find me. -Especially- if he's in the company of any girls."
<Jack> "Yes ma'am."
* Aleph nods, standing.
<Merc> "Alright, out with you two. I'm going to be looking around the shops behind the mayor's office if you do need to find me."
* Jack bids his adiue (collecting his things, if necessary) and heads leaves the jail.
* Aleph gets his stuff if needed, and then flashes her a smile on the way out.
<Merc> "Scoundrels," she mutters, though smiling slightly as she locks up the building behind them.

***

* Aleph heads straight for the town center, clearly to be the site of the festivities
<Merc> Music gets louder as the two head closer towards the town plaza, where most of the action, food and merriment is to be found. Along the way, vendors shout, asking for the pair to sample their wares.
* Aleph would clearly sample the booze and any food that was offered. Party was a party, after all...
* Jack mainly keeps to himself, mainly checking the crowd for easy marks, more out of habit then any desire to actually rob someone
* Aleph only refrains from skirtflips and pickpocketing out of a desire to not be stuck in jail again
<Merc> Aleph doesn't seem to luck out with any offerings of booze, but there's quite a few vendors that offer some food samples only to look momentarily annoyed when Aleph simply moves on. The duo quickly make way to the town center, where a crowd seems to be forming around Finyard's Fountain, cheers ringing out at some show. The people around there seem the most distracted, apparently enjoying themselves.
* Jack heads towards the the fountain.
* Aleph likewise heads forward. Whatever's there must be rather interesting.
<Maya> In front of the fountain was one of the town's familiar sights and more exotic wonders, her hair twirling with her quick motions as each step sent little rings sliding up and down her arms and legs in a surprisingly musical melody.  The townsfolks watched in wonder as she switched from spinning a pair of flame bearing sticks around to producing a sword from behind herself that shouldn't have managed to hide there.
<Maya>  She twirled steadily, spinning it in her hands around to gain momentum as she brushed against its bladed side with her hands protected only by slight red fingerless gloves, leading into a swift performance with the quite shiny weapon, twirling about the small clearing in feats of unimaginable dexterity.
<Merc> The crowds cheer, some flinging a few copper coins into a hat on the ground nearby, some of the boys simply whistling and clapping.
* Aleph simply stands there, watching and smiling. It's always entertaining, partly for wondering, indeed, how the hell the momentum hadn't flung the blade out of her hands. And the other for, of course, the eye-candy.
<Jack> "I'll never figure out how such a small girl weilds such a large weapon."
<Maya> Her costume definitely left nothing to the imagination as her loincloth spun with her quick twirling form, her leaps and bounds gathering attention as she ended on top of the fountain, ending with a quick bouncing bow before her blade vanished behind her, the flowing water behind her outlining her form.  "Next show in half an hour," She winked playfully at the loud applause.
<Merc> Some of the people go "awww" in dissapointment, others simply cheer, as the crowd begins to disperse, and see the rest of the shops and shows around the plaza.
* Maya smiles, brushing her long hair gently back as she stepped down, gathering her things and setting a sign for the same.  Festivals were always great times for fortune, but even talented girls like herself needed a chance to catch her breath and get lunch once in a while.  She wondered how her parents were doing on their stand as she started to head away from the fountain area herself.
<Aleph> "Moya moya..." Aleph decides to head in the direction of the dancer girl. "Hey." he greets nonchalantly, hand raised in greeting and his typical smile on his face.
* Jack sticks around to watch what will doubtlessly be entertaining.
<Maya> She glanced over her shoulder, an enigmatic smile on her face as she sized up Aleph, recalling somewhat the infamous slacker.  "Hmm? did you need something?" Her voice teasing, but a bit cold, turning only halfway toward facing him.  "My next show isn't for a bit."
<Aleph> "Sheesh.  I was just saying hi." The freeloader was slightly taken aback by the coldness inherent.
<Maya> "Well, hi," She favored him with a quick smile, used to charming her way through most things...and generally with the natural looks to pull it off with ease.
* Aleph paused, considering engineering a fall to accidentally brush against certain 'assets' of hers, before reconsidering, given the massive blade. "Some festival, isn't it? Free samples and everything."
<Maya> "You know, you might have more luck begging in the rich quarter, Aleph," Well, she definitely recognized him, even if she had the wrong impression entirely, turning to walk away a bit heading toward one of the food stands setup nearby, looking for any taste of the exotic coming through as they sometimes did during the festivals.
* Jack chuckles and walks up to Aleph.
<Jack> "Well, that certainly could have gone better."
<Aleph> "Eh, could've gone worse." Aleph shrugs. "Besides.  There'll be another show in roughly half an hour anyway."

***

<Jack> "I don't know about you, but I could use a bite. Sadly, we weren't in jail quite long enough for a free meal."
* Aleph shrugs. He knows he's not well-liked around here. A bit of an annoyance, but at the same time, not horrible. This time was one of the few there was something to happen anywa--well, you could peruse the free samples?"
<Merc> "Hello Maya, wonderful show as always," one of the vendors calls out to Maya, waving his arms over his selection of steaming hot pies. "Care for a bite after all that jumping around?"
* Jack elbows Aleph, "Tell you what, let's go grab a bite to eat over at that stall." Indicates the one Maya went to "I'll treat you, and you can get a second chance at 'er. Whaddaya say?"
<Aleph> "Eh.  I'm headed off to try being honest for once." Aleph shrugs.  "There'll be other times, you know?"
* Jack shrugs "Suit yourself."
* Jack heads off for a quick bite with a parting wave to Aleph.
* Aleph nods in response.
<Maya> She winked, "Oh definitely.  It works up quite the appetite," She sidled close to the vendor, a smile across her pretty face as she breathed in the wonderful smell, leaning over playfully teasing the vendor.  "What's your suggestion?"
<Aleph> And with that, the slacker heads off to look for Jayce.
<Merc> "Any of 'em, they're all good!" the vendor responds to Maya with a huff.
* Aleph heads off to look for the guy...if only until something else occupies his attention span.
<Merc> No signs of Jayce so far, although he does catches sight of Cerisse after a few minutes. She frowns and motions from the distance as if asking if he's found anything. Looks like she's had no luck finding her boyfriend.
* Aleph shrugs and shakes his head. No sign of him either.
<Maya> "Now, now, we both know your pies are the best in town, Joe," She winked, picking one.  "I was just wondering if you had any new creations," She put down the Maya rate for them, barely anything, but the in town shopkeepers tended to almost give her free eats anyway.  It wasn't like her act didn't do good for their business.
<Merc> Cerisse looks annoyed and huffs, as she storms off down one of the streets away from Aleph.
* Aleph , of course, does end up snatching additional free samples along the way.
* Aleph ends up continuing the search for Jayce.
* Jack heads off for a nice slice of pie.
<Merc> He laughs. "Don't worry, you don't have to charm me for a discount. I'll give ya two free slices for the show you put in front of my stall. Brought me some business, so it's only fair. But hey, have a meat pie. The mayor seemed to think it was the best of the bunch when he sampled some of 'em."
* Maya smiles and takes the small plate. "Ah just the thing to perk me up.  I'll wave them over here on the next show," she smiled, wandering off, looking about to see if her parents stall was setup anywhere nearby.  Might as well say hi to them and see if they're doing well too.  If not, she'll sit in the shade and enjoy getting off her feet for a moment.
<Merc> The vendor nods at Maya and looks at Jack. "Alright, young man, what'll you have? Same as the girl, or feel like trying somethign else? We've got all sorts here!"
<Jack> "I'll try the meat pie."
<Jack> "How much for a slice?"
<Merc> "8 copper, my friend! Nice and cheap, yet delicious as can be!" The vendor replies. Meanwhile, it looks like Aleph got lucky. He's apparently managed to spot young Mr. Skydale...who is apparently -not- with a miss Shari as he'd expected. In fact, he looks like he's not quite enjoying himself as much as he'd like, as he heads towards one of the stalls with some sort of game.
* Jack lays down the money and takes a slice.
* Aleph decides to shadow Mr. Skydale for a bit. After all, rumors usually have some degree of truth to them. And it's the most immediately interesting thing at the moment...though he idly checks out the surrounding stalls from his vantage point.
<Jack> "Delicious."
<Merc> "Thanks! Enjoy the meal!" the vendor says in return before returning to getting other people to come to his stall. Maya in the meantime also finds herself at her parents' stall, where a pair of girls seem to be perusing the games her father is running.
* Jack wanders the festival, pie in hand.

***

<Elise> "I'm not sure I understand the purpose of this stall," Elise says. "There's no pie anywhere."
* Maya headed over there, pausing to give her father a quick kiss on the cheek.  "Has things been going well, papa?" She smiled cheerfully at the younger girls and her brother.  "You should come by and watch my show later," She teasingly said.  "Oh, no purpose?  Why don't you ask Mama for a fortune," Maya pointed at tent nearby which suggested that one could learn one's future there.
<Anassia> "It's a game," Anassia says, glancing over Elise, quirking an eyebrow faintly, before blinking towards Maya.  "Show?  What kind of show?" she asks curiously.  "And fortunes?  Sounds fun."
<Elise> "A game?" Elise says skeptically, as though this were something she'd only heard about being practiced in backwards foreign parts. "How does it work?"
<Merc> "It's going alright and I'll do that. A lot of people more interested in food like our young guest, though," Maya's father says with a laugh. "Your mother is inside the tent, feel free to go inside, nobody's gone in for their fortune yet."
<Merc> "And the game, of course, is a game of chance, the best sort of game as no one man has an advantage over the other, only how lucky they are," the man aswers Elise, letting Maya explain the concept of fortune telling.
* Elise looks horrified. It's a moment before she speaks, clearly aghast. "Games of chance are clearly proscribed by the Book of Seals!"
<Maya> "Come this way dears," Maya smiled cheerfully, "For a handful fo silver, you can know what will come for you over the next year, perhaps avoid a bit of unneeded hardship," She smiled at the younger girls, standing beside the red cloaked tent.  "Maybe even see if love is in the cards for you," Her heart dropped a bit at hearing that.  Nothing like a religious fanatic to ruin a good round of fleece the tourist.
<Merc> The man blinks at that, though he doesn't let himself look particularly nonplussed. "Well, now, why would the book of seals say that? A game of chance is the best way to see how well you connect with the lord. Those with luck are those with the best of connections, now aren't they?" he answers, taking a chance at guessing that Elise is speaking of some religious matter.
<Anassia> Anassia gives Elise another quizzical glance at her proclamation, blinking, before quirking an eyebrow over towards Maya.  "A handful of silver?" she asks, curiously.
<Maya> "Simply head in and place it on the table and the seer will greet you with your fortune," She encouraged the girl inside.
* Elise shakes her head. "The best way to connect with the lord is through honest hard work," she says with conviction.
<Merc> "Hrm...well, I do run an honest game, unlike some fellows that shall remain unnamed, and I suppose it's gonna be hard work to get the young lady to play?" he says in a laughing tone. "Though if you're not interested in the game, as mentioned, the wife is also reading people's fortunes."
<Elise> "Fortune-telling?" Elise says slowly, as if now examining the man's every word for some foul taint. "How does it work?"
<Anassia> She ponders for another moment at Maya's insistance, before grinning.  "What've I got to lose?" she wonders, heading into the tent curiously.  It's a festival, after all.  Having fortunes read is, like, tradition.  Or something.
<Merc> The man shrugs. "Can't say. Wife likes to keep her secrets. I -can- say that she's usually right about 'em though. Maybe wrong five percent of the time."
* Elise frowns. "I will...observe this fortune-telling," she decides, implying by tone that the establishment is on probation at best. She follows Anassia into the tent.
<Merc> As Elise and Anassia step in, they find a woman looking much like an older version of Maya, if more conservatively dressed. She seems to be playing with a deck of cards, which she puts down once the two step in. "Welcome," she greets simply.
* Maya sits down near the tent, waving to folks and helping draw people toward the stand as she enjoyed her lunch break.
<Anassia> "Hello," Anassia says, blinking towards the woman, somehow having expected something a little more... extravagant?  Especially after Maya.  
* Elise sits down across from the woman. "This fortune-telling does not involve the sacrifice of chickens or the rolling of kuncklebones, does it?" she asks by way of greeting.
<Merc> The woman blinks and laughs at that. "Oh lord no! You simply ask what you wish to know, and I will read it in the cards. I will say no more on the how, however. If everyone knew how to read cards, well I'd certainly have no business as a fortune teller, now would I?"
<Elise> "I'll watch," Elise decides. She looks at Anassia. "Do you want to go first?"
<Anassia> "Sure," Anassia says, reaching to produce the money, handing it over towards the older woman.  "What's in store for me?" she asks, somwhat curious what the answer will be.
<Merc> "Rather broad request," the woman smiles at Anassia's request. "But we'll see what we get with that."
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 1 >
<Merc> ooc: ...hah.
<Merc> ooc: well, she's going to be wrong it looks. Bad luck there Maya's mom.
<Maya> OOC: ;_;  Bad  Penuche!

***

<Merc> Jayce Skydale isn't doing much of anything as Aleph shadows him, just lingering around the plaza, really. Every now and then, he seems to ask people a question, looking dejected at the replies.
<Merc> ooc: Listen check if you're interested, Aleph?
* Aleph maintains his attempt to stay stealthy as he tries to catch the guy doing something bad...for about seven minutes tops, if his attention span doesn't give well before then.
<Aleph> OOC: and by bad, obviously implying that he's cheating.
<Merc> Aleph really doesn't notice anything of the sort, it looks like. Chances are, he's looking for Cerisse himself (well, maybe), given the dejected look he sometimes gets after asking questions. Or maybe he's looking for Shari or some other woman. Who knows?
* Aleph shrugs and starts to wander around.
<Aleph> Nothing to find, no reason to keep on going.  What's the worst that could happen?  Bad relationship melodrama and a breakup?
<Merc> At that, it seems Cerisse appears in Aleph's sights again. Doesn't look like she's spotted Jayce, but she's spotted Aleph. She motions again, same as last time.
* Aleph points in the direction he last found Jayce in.
<Merc> Cerisse brightens at that and starts walking towards Aleph. "You found him?" she asks once she's within range.
* Aleph nods "Yeah. Looks like he's looking for someone. Can't tell who."
<Merc> Cerisse frowns lightly at that. "He is? You know who he's looking for?" she asks as she looks in the direction Aleph had pointed earlier she spots him just as he's asking the pie vendor something, coming into sight of Jack as well.
<Merc> "Have you seen Cerisse?" Jayce asks of the vendor. "She was supposed to be busy today, but I stopped by and place was closed..."
<Merc> "Can't say I have...she hasn't been around the plaza that I've seen, sorry Jayce," the vendor replies. Jayce looks dejected at that. "Damn! Wonder why I can't find her..."
<Jack> "Hooboy..."
<Aleph> "Couldn't make out who he's looking for, but...well, he's over there."
* Aleph points at the guy.
* Jack walks up to Jayce and taps him on the shoulder
<Jack> "Did you say you were looking for Cerisse?"
<Merc> Cerisse starts to head towards Jayce as Jack taps the man in question, who turnaround rapidly. "Yes! You've seen her?"
<Jack> "Right over there."
* Jack indicates Cerisse who's heading over
<Jack> "I'll be off now. Good day."
* Aleph decides to walk off elsewhere before anything regarding him starts.
<Aleph> 'If any problems start, I do NOT want to be caught in the middle of them' he thinks.
<Merc> "Cerisse! There you are! I've been looking all over for you!" Jayce exclaims as he heads towards Cerisse. "You have? I've been looking for you, you jerk! Why have you been so hard to find?" The two squabble, but seem happy to see each other.
<Aleph> 'Well.  That's one problem out of my way.  Pity I can't get a good view today on penalty of further crushing boredom...'
* Aleph looks around at the on-scene stalls.
<Merc> It's mostly food, some simple games and shows around the plaza, Aleph.
* Aleph browses the games and shows for now...

***

<Merc> The woman begins to shuffle the cards while humming a nice tune to herself, her eyes closed. After a while, she begins to flip six cards and staring at them.
<Merc> "Hrm..."
<Merc> "Oh my. Are you keeping secrets from your parents? Perhaps been seeing a young boy? According to these, your secret will be revealed, and bring great joy and unity..."
<Merc> The woman looks at Anassia, looking somewhat curious about what secret the cards speak of.
<Anassia> Anassia quirks an eyebrow.  "I haven't been seeing a boy," she says, frowning slightly.
<Merc> "Hrm, well, it still says you have a secret you've been keeping from the family. Share whatever it is soon. As I said, it will bring joy and unity," she recommends.
<Elise> "Are you sure?" Elise wonders. "Maybe it means you're going to get married?"
<Merc> Maya's mother shakes her head. "No, if your friend isn't seeing any boy, that's not likely. The cards did not share what her secret might be, that was purely a guess on my part, I admit."
<Merc> "Anyway, that shall be two silver. Would you like to try your hand at this as well, miss?" she asks.
<Anassia> Anassia shrugs a little, waiting to see if Elise agrees to actually get her fortune read... although she hardly considers it to be likely, with how she reacted to the games...
<Elise> "Young girls shouldn't keep secrets," Elise says. "They should trust their parents! ...Oh, me?" Well. There's nothing *obviously* heretical about the enterprise...It might be safe. She slips the woman two silvers and watches her closely for any signs of duplicity. "I am sure I know what my future holds, so we will test whether you speak truth or not."
<Merc> "Well, what are you seeking? Something broad as well, or something more specific?"
<Elise> "What is my destiny?" she offers.
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 7 >
<Merc> The woman nods and begins to shuffle her cards once more, in the same fashion as before. Once another set of cards are flipped, she stares at them. "The cards, they are vague but...it looks like a journey is ahead of you, with companions. Stay vigilant, trouble approaches."
<Merc> "I'm sorry I could not be more precise," she adds in an apologetic tone, a small frown as she looks at the last card. "Your future seemed somewhat clouded besides that."
* Elise nods. "Good enough advice," she says. "Evil is always around. It just takes a sharp eye to find it."
<Merc> "Well said, miss," she notes with a smile. "It never hurts to be vigilant."
<Merc> "Enjoy the festival."
* Elise stands up and exits the tent, not having anything more to say and at least somewhat reassured that this stall is not a wholly criminal enterprise.
<Anassia> "We will," Anassia says as she follows behind Elise as she leaves the tent, stretching her arms slightly.

***

<Merc> As the pair of girls exit the tent, the father greets them, looking up from his talks with his daughter. "Have a good experience you two?" he asks.
* Aleph browses the tents and stalls, and comes upon the one that the girls are promptly exiting...
<Elise> "I am not sure it is worth two silvers to pay someone to tell me what I already know," Elise says, "but I am glad to see nothing unsuitably arcane going on here."
<Merc> The man snorts in a good natured manner and shakes his head. "Well, I'm glad for that. Listen, Maya is going to have a show soon, feel free to watch. Might be more worth your time, I suppose, and it'll be at the plaza, where all the food stalls are at." He looks at Aleph as he approaches. "Hello young man. You interested in a game of chance or getting your fortune read?"
<Elise> "What manner of show is it?" Elise asks.
* Anassia nods to the father, grinning. "Yeah," she says, before quirking an eyebrow towards Elise. "Something arcane? Here? And I keep hearing about these shows, what are they?"
* Maya rises easily tossing away her trash in a nearby bin.  "Good luck with the rest of the day father," She smiled.  "Well you two might find more entertainment following me," She winked.  "It's a sight like no other in town, my dancing," She swayed toward the town square once more.
<Aleph> "Hm.  I'll go with the fortune out of curiosity."
<Merc> "Step inside then," he motions towards the tent before waving at Maya goodbye. "Have a good show, dear."
* Aleph heads into the tent.
<Merc> "Welcome, young man. Two silver for your fortune. Just ask what sort of information you'd like, broad or precise, and I shall do my best to seek it."
<Aleph> "I'll take precise" he responds, reaching into his pocket and grabbing his last two silver, before plunking them down.
<Merc> "Alright then, what do you seek?" she asks with a smile.
<Aleph> "Fortune on...well, let's be brave here, relationships." he replies.
<Merc> "That's not too precise, but neither is it very broad. Is that what you seek, or have something more precise to ask?" The woman requests, since Aleph had asked for something precise earlier.
<Aleph> "Well, what luck will I have with relationships within the next month?"
<Merc> "That'll do," she nods as she begins to shuffle the tarot cards, again humming as she does this with her eyes closed, until she flips a set of cards over and looks them over.
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 16 >
<Merc> "Nothing lasting, I would say, though you'll -certainly- impress a girl or two within the next month," she says with a small amused smile as she reads the card. "I suppose all I can say to that is that you have fun then, young man."
<Aleph> "Heh.  Sounds definitely like it could be exciting.  Thanks for the fortune."
<Merc> "Of course. And before you ask, no, my daughter is not one of those girls. Enjoy her show though!" she states, still looking amused with the cards' result.
* Aleph snrks.
<Aleph> "Now, now.  Am I that bad?" Aleph comments this as he gets up.
<Merc> "You do have the reputation. Now, out with you. Shoo, shoo!"
* Aleph goes out and indeed heads off for the show.

***

* Elise eyes Maya up and down. "You perform...in *that*? What sort of dancing does one do in such an outfit?" Elise sounds vaguely like she's skirting the edge of some unexplored abyss.
* Maya laughs gently, like bells swaying in the breeze.  "Oh don't be so shy.  Folks far prefer to see a beautiful dancer than a shy girl up there," She smiled, confidence clear in every motion as she swayed teasingly past Elise, leading the way back to the fountain and past the slowly gathering crowd, waving her arms gently in a fashion that gave off a peculiar and attention getting ringing.
* Anassia glances over towards Elise, before grinning slightly. "Oh, this is going to be amusing," she says softly to herself, gesturing for the other girl to follow.
<Elise> "I..." Elise can only linger after Maya, looking like a bystander unable to turn away from the sight of a terrible disaster.
<Maya> She clapped, building a rhythm as folks began to clap along with her, her voice ringing out in a pleasant song as she encouraged the big hearted villagers to come and watch her dance, to take a break from the sunny skies and sit awhile before the fountain, her performance beginning anew as she drew streamers from nowhere twirling about, sending glitter over the heads of the nearby villagers as she swirled along, letting the crowd grow for a moment, her flips and flexibility quite amazing perhaps to the non-gymnasts in the crowd.
* Jack catches a glimpse of Anassia watching the performance, and walks over "Oi, well, if it isn't Anassia! In town to enjoy the festival, I take it. How have you been?"
* Elise watches, open-mouthed. "This...this is allowed on the streets?" she gasps. "What manner of god is this Arune, to allow such a display?" She steps forward and points an accusatory finger at Maya. "You dance licentiously for money!"
<Jack> "And uh, who is your... Colorful friend?"
* Anassia starts as she hears her name, turning towards Jack. "Hey, Jack. It's been a while. And, yeah. Nice to get out for a--" she pauses at Elise's exclamation, glancing over to her. "Oh, this is Elise."
* Maya laughed widely at the sight, winking lavaciously at the innocent Elise as the villagers applauded and she backflipped onto the fountain wall twirling as she dropped the streamers, her metal rings clanging together in a musical rhythm as she clapped and twirled, suddenly holding a gigantic sword in her hands after a few spins.
<Jack> "Where DOES she get that sword?"
<Maya> The sword begins to twirl with her as she built up speed, flinging it high and catching it, twirling and catching it, twirling toward the center of the circling audience once more as they ooh'ed and aah'ed at the amazing sight of a girl holding a blade ever so much bigger than herself.
* Elise reels as if struck. She turns to Anassia in desperation. "Why is no one aghast at this? They should look away, for their souls!"
* Aleph watches intently, as is typical for Aleph.
<Merc> People cheer as they continue to watch the show.
<Anassia> "I... don't know," Anassia says, glancing towards Maya momentarily, before turning to Elise.  "Because," she says, shrugging.  "Besides, it's just some dancing."
<Elise> "But it's...suggestive dancing!" Elise counters, with the tone of someone who's not precisely sure what's being suggested but nonetheless set on not approving of it.
* Aleph listens in on Anassia and Elise, the conversation becoming interesting.
<Maya> Some dancing is perhaps a light way of putting it as she bent over nearly horizontal to the ground twirling as she hugged her blade in a flip and then bouncing back to her feet from the other side, moving the blade as naturally as a limb as she twirled with the sharp end coming ever close to the shock and delight of some watchers as she flirted with such a dangerous dance.
<Aleph> "And I like watching it.  I wouldn't say that's a problem."
<Elise> "I would! I--" Elise cuts short after seeing that last maneuver. "How is that possible?"
* Jack chuckles.
<Anassia> "...yeah, and?" Anassia says, quirking an eyebrow slightly to Elise.  "I can think of worse things."  She glances towards Aleph at the comment, blinking.  At Elise's last comment, though, she grins.  "See?"
<Maya> She extended it to the edge, doing one last twirl and leaping back, taking another bouncy bow as she saluted the crowd with a smile, such feats of unreal acrobatic second nature to the skillful dancer.
<Elise> "Being skilled at something sinful is nothing to be praised! I was just surprised."
* Aleph snrks. "There's nothing sinful about it, you know."
<Merc> The crowd erupts in cheers, some coins being flinged again as thanks for the show.

*** The Opening Act ***

<Elise> "But there is! It's in the Septinomicon--" Elise is about to quote the actual passage before being drowned out by the crowd.
<Jack> "The septi- what now?"
<Aleph> "But the crowd loves it!  It must be good if they do!"
<Merc> As the crowd quiets down, however, a slow loud clapping continues to be heard. "That guard was right, that was a fun show. Perfectly worth the short delay," a voice calls out. It's a cloaked man, leaning against the balcony of the mayor's building. A quiet mutters follows, as people wonder who he is. Elise and Anassia recognize him though.
* Elise looks astonished. "The holy book? How can it be that you don't know of it? I can show you my copy later if you want--" She stops, and turns towards the new voice.
<Merc> The man winds up his arm, spinning it rapidly before flinging something in the direction of the fountain.
<Aleph> "What the--!"
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 4 >
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 13 >
<Jack> "I don't like the looks of this."
<Merc> "Ow!" a portly man exclaims as a gold coin smacks against his forehead. "Sorry about that! Just wanted to give some payment for the show!" the man on the balcony calls out.
<Merc> A bit of laughter follows that.
* Aleph cocks an eyebrow. There's...something off about this guy...
* Anassia turns to glance towards the figure. "Hey, it's that guy," she says, before blinking as he throws the gold. "Throwing gold?" she asks, curious.
* Jack calls out "And who might you be sir?"
* Maya laughs and smiles, not thinking much of it as she waves to her audience.
<Merc> The man bows at Jack's statement. "Thank you for asking that! My friends, my name is Kenmore. I shall be your host today in a very special show!" he exclaims with a smile.
<Merc> Some people cheer. While still wondering who this man is, they seem mostly amused after the gold coin incident.
<Aleph> (Can I make a sense motive?)
* Elise is totally confused by this turn of events, but at least it's taken everyone's attention from the lewdness.
<Merc> ooc: If you'd like, sure.
<Aleph> roll d20+6 sense motive
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 12 >
<Jack> roll d20+7 sense motive
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
* Maya clucks her tongue a bit.  "There'll be more to see later at the inn," She teased the audience, hopping down as she swiped the gold coin, adding it to her little bin of 'donations' that folks had been tossing itno.
<Merc> Kenmore looks to be enjoying himself to Aleph's and Jack's eyes, nothing particularly stands out.
<Merc> "Now, as you'll notice, there are men clothed similarly to me around the plaza," Kenmore notes. "See them, folks?" He gives them a bit of time to spot them.
* Elise looks around for the closest such man, not sure what the point of this new show is but somewhat curious.
<Aleph> "...He seems cheerful enough.  And yet something is very very off here..."
<Merc> There's about...twelve people around the plaza, two by each exit of the plaza, and two more at the entrance to the mayor's building.
* Anassia looks around as well, blinking slightly. "Is this normal?" she asks Jack, tilting her head slightly.
<Jack> "No."
<Jack> "I don't like this, not at all."
<Aleph> "..." Aleph tenses up.  There's something not in the ordinary here, to be sure...
<Jack> "They've got people by the exits."
<Merc> "Now! I must inform you, participation is obligatory, some of you may disagree with the show, but it's for a good cause," Kenmore notes. With that, he pulls out a crossbow. "Let the festivities...BEGIN!"
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
<Merc> The bolt fires, and goes through a random stall owner's head.
<Jack> "Fuck."
<Merc> People blink, as if unsure what just happened, and Kenmore's men pull out swords.
<Aleph> "That's it.  Everyone, get out or take cover!"

***

<Merc> ooc: Roll initiative.
<Elise> roll 1d20+2
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Aleph> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 20 >
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 23 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 23 >
<Anassia> roll 1d20+2
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> roll 7#d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 4, 12, 12, 17, 15, 20, 15 >

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > NPCs #6 > Aleph (20) > NPCs #4 > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2+3 > Anassia (8) > NPCs #1'

*** ROUND 1 ***

<Jack> "Aleph! Take take out the one with the bow, I'll work at opening up an exit!"
<Aleph> "Well ahead of you on that!"
<Jack> "You and you!" He gestures to Maya and Elise "If you know how to use those, may I suggest lending a hand?"

* Maya eyes narrowed in more than a little anger.  That was one of her many friends that that horrible man just killed, her feet beginning to pick up rhythm in place as she glanced around at the terrible bandits who would dare pull this at one of their festivals.
* Maya tsks angrily as she begins to move, her foot tapping twice giving a familiar jingle as she started to run, leaping high to the nearest stand, twisting and bouncing stand to stand, somehow rushing along before her weight would tear through the cloth rooftops, leaping and grabbing onto a roped banner along the side holding a sign advertising Sweet Pies she tore it, using her momentum to arc and leap from bouncing off the side of the nearest building and twirling in the surprising gesture to swing at Kenmore's head in retaliation for slaying poor Abby.
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 versus 15
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 32 > SUCCESS
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 vs 20.  I jump for justice
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 29 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+5 tumbling leaping strike!  No way he saw this coming...  hope I hit.
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 6 > FAILURE

<Merc> "Holy hell!" Kenmore exclaims as Maya comes close to shaving his head off, but unfortunately, she spun too early, and the swing just barely missed his nose. (ooc - Roll balance to land on the balcony ledge)
<Maya> roll 1d20+8
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 28 > SUCCESS
<Merc> Maya makes a perfect landing on the ledge, giving Kenmore a perfect sight of her shapely legs...and the greatsword blocking the rest of his sight of the plaza.

<Merc> ooc - Jack

* Jack heads towards the west exit swords drawn "I hope I know what I'm doing."
* Jack swings his blades as soon as he comes into contact with one of the robed figures
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 5 > FAILURE
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 20 >
<Jack> roll 1d6+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 10 >
<Merc> Jack's first swing whiffs, missing Kenmore's man fully, but it seems to distract him into the waiting path of the second blade, which fully cuts him in half, the blade ripping right through his chest.

<Merc> Two of the other men, the pair by the south-east exit, meanwhile start attacking at random people near reach.
<Merc> As they quickly make mince out of a mother and child, people finally seem to settle into what's happenign and scream, starting to panic.

<Merc> ooc - Aleph

<Aleph> "Kgh.  I don't care how boring this place is on average..." Aleph draws his bow with one hand and an arrow with another, setting his sights on the one who just butchered the two civilians.  "I'm not letting them simply get butchered at random!"
* Aleph spins his arrow as he draws and fires a shot at the nearer killer.
<Aleph> roll 1d20+5 please let this not suck.
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 22 >
<Merc> ooc: hit
<Aleph> roll 1d8 lol bow damage.
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> The arrow screams vengeance as it flies unerringly through the mobs without harming anyone until it flies straight into the childkiller's chest, drawing a burst of blood from his mouth. He's still standing though, but it looks like he's not long from this world.

<Merc> Meanwhile, the pair from the northeastern exit proceed to hack in half a pair of vendors.

<Merc> Kenmore meanwhile looks up towards the towering Maya. "Damn, toots, I toss you some gold and you try to knock my head clear off? Where's the gratitude? Sorry, but you're going DOWN, woman!" With that, he drops his crossbow and attempts to push Maya off her precarious ledge and down to the hard plaza ground, even as he leaves himself open to a counterattack from the off-balance dancer. (OOC - AoO for Maya)
<Maya> roll 1d20+5 I hate level 1 rolls :(
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >
<Maya> roll 3d6+6 that beats all of our defense bonuses, it better hit
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 22 >
<Merc> ooc - hits with higher ground bonus. Okay, time for strenght checks from bull rush.
<Maya> roll 1d20-1 ;_;
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
<Merc> ooc - going to resolve all rolls before typing
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 2 >

<Merc> As Kenmore attempts to push Maya off, however, he was entirely too careless, Maya swinging her giant blade into his side, pushing him to the side, and managing to keep her foothold on the ledge by pure luck. Kenmore curses as he bleeds from his side and screams indoors, "BUMS! GET IN HERE! TROUBLE!"

<Merc> roll d20 init
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 16 >
* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Npcs #6 > Aleph (20) > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2+3 > Anassia (8) > NPCs #1'

<Merc> The mooks out in the plaza continue with their orders, as the lackies by the entrance to the building start rushing inward at Kenmore's cry.

<Merc> ooc - Elise

* Elise slings her hammer around and hefts it in her hands. Didn't her father always say to be prepared at all times? Yes, he did. "VILLAINS! Stay where you are and accept a righteous smiting!" Elise yells as she races toward the cloaked man near Jack and takes a wild swing at his head.
<Elise> roll 1d20+9 charging
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 26 >
<Merc> ooc - hit
<Elise> roll 2d6+7
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >
<Merc> The maul does as it is named and quite literally mauls the man before he got a chance to act, caving his brain into smushy bits, his body flopping down into the ground.

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Npcs #6 > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2+3 > Anassia (8)'

<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 19 >

<Merc> The other minions guarding exits curse as Jack and Elise make quick work out of the guards on one side. Two of them attempt to kill some more people, unfortunately, they pick the wrong people as they foolishly attempt to attack Cerisse and Jayce, who fight back. The remaining pair, however, move towards Jack and Elise, leaving their own exit open.
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >
<Merc> roll d6+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 4 >
<Elise> roll 1d3 damage resist
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 1 >

<Merc> As they charge towards Jack and Elise, one of them misses completely with the thrust of his sword, but the other manages to nick Elise on the side.

<Merc> ooc - Anassia

* Anassia starts as the crossbow goes off, looking to the shopkeeper for a heartbeat before turning back to the man. "...no," she says softly. A wind blows through the town square, ruffling her hair and dress as the irises of her eyes begin to change to a deep red color, glowing softly even in the daylight. She turns to regard the killers coldy, lifting a hand to gesture at them angrilly. "You will not be surviving this day," she says. [Move Action to activate Overwhelming Presence]
<Anassia> roll 1d20+5 v 15 [Free Action Concentration Check]
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 16 >

<Anassia> With power gathering around her hands, Anassia focuses for but a moment before casting a blue orb from her palm, crackling with magical power, towards one of the thugs who have slain one of the farmers, scowling darkly.
<Anassia> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 9 >
<Merc> Anassia's righteous fury is not enough, and the attempt to cast magic works much like most of the world expects of it. The orb goes flying off into the roof of a building. Whoops.

*** ROUND 2 ***

* Topic is 'Maya = Jack (23) > Npcs #6 > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2+3 > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - Maya and Jack.

* Maya grins grimly, "Perhaps you shouldn't have shot at my friends...if you think a gold is enough to buy kindness after that, you are well mistaken," She leaped over him, twirling as she slashed at him from behind and landing and bouncing up to grab and kip up to the rooftop right above the balcony.
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 jump
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 24 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 tumble
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 21 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+7 attack with no Active defense bonus
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >
<Maya> roll 3d6+6 damage
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 kip up
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 19 >

<Merc> Kenmore winces as blood drips from his mouth, his back equally as slashed as his side. "Damn...woman..." he mutters, looking quite pained.

<Merc> ooc - Jack.

* Jack runs over to the goon that stuck Elise and shanks him back
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 7 >
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> Jack's strikes go wide unfortunately as he tries to be a gentleman. Oh well.

<Merc> The two mooks that killed the mother and child scowl, one of them taking particular offense to being hit in the chest with an arrow. Both attempt to charge at Aleph, but with all the people around, they don't make it very far. Frustrated, they simply take swipes at people on their way to Aleph, adding two more casualties.

<Merc> ooc - Aleph

* Aleph , noting the opening to the leader and the incoming enemies, makes a quick dash for one of the stands as he attempts to leap up onto one of them--hopefully for a better shot and to be harder to get close to...
<Aleph> roll 1d20+7 tumble
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 26 >
<Aleph> roll 1d20+6 jump
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> While Aleph makes it easily to a stand, his jump doesn't work out so well for him, stubbing his toe against the stand, not even making it to the roof.

<Aleph> Resisting the urge to curse at the damned thing, he quickly tries to salvage his maneuver by firing a shot at the leader, Kenmore...
<Aleph> roll 1d20+5 attack
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 10 >
<Merc> Perhaps the stubbed toe's pain screwed up his shot, but the arrow makes a thwack noise as it lodges itself on the balcony's ledge.

<Merc> The mob seeing all the openings forming begin to rush towards the exits and just being chaotic in general. OOC - Moving just became more difficult. Riot Condition Zone is in effect in the plaza now.

<Merc> The mooks seem frustrated and take it out on what townsfolk they can. Two more meet their demise to the actions of the ones guarding one of the exits.

<Merc> A trio of men storm into the mayor's office, responding to Kenmore's earlier cry. "She's on the roof, you morons! Come here and kill her!" he exclaims as they move towards the balcony. Kenmore himself makes his way deeper into the building, out of sight from the plaza, shoveling his way past his minions.

<Merc> The guards in the mayor's building just keep running through the first floor.

<Merc> ooc - Elise

* Elise turns on the cloaked man that attacked her and swings. "Slaughterer of innocents! Ruiner of festivals! Die!"
<Elise> roll 1d20+7
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Merc> ooc - hit
<Elise> roll 2d6+7
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Merc> Another minion gets his brain caved in!

<Merc> Two of the mooks continue to struggle with Cerisse and Skydale, while the one that attacked Jack decides Elise is the bigger threat and attempts to stab her from behind.
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 12 >
<Merc> He misses in his backstabbery though.

<Merc> ooc - Anassia

* Anassia scowls as her bolt flies off target, instead scoring a hit on a nearby roof. However, when she is jostled by the crowd she lets out a small cry of surprise, scowling at the people who jostle her, trying to maintain her position and keep watching her target.
<Anassia> roll 1d20 v 10
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
<Anassia> As she manages to keep her ground, Anassia focuses again, pushing the jostling from her mind as she begins to focus her power once again... aaaand...
<Anassia> roll 1d20+5 v 15
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >

<Anassia> The power coallescing in her palm, cracking again, Anassia extends her palm towards the same thug as before, the ball of crackling blue energy flying forth at him
<Anassia> roll 1d20+4-4
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 19 >
<Anassia> roll 1d6+4
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> The orb crackles as it flies through the air without harming the townspeople, and striking into the chest of the companion to the child killer, eating right through his armor. Blood leaks from under the armor, soaking his shirt.
<Cidward> God willing, we'll all meet in Buttquest 2: The Quest for More Butts.

Merc

#1
*** ROUND 3 ***

* Topic is 'Maya = Jack (23) > NPCs #6 > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2+3 > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - Maya

* Maya grabs back onto the roof edge and twists, flipping under the very edge and over the heads of the three goons that came out to get her, doing a roll through the door and rushing after him... (OOC: Waiting to see what I see before resolving rest of motion)
<Merc> ooc - You mind changing that action, Maya? The goons didn't actually make it out the balcony door, they're still inside, though they're close to the door. Kenmore did push past them though.
* Maya grabs back onto the roof edge and twists, flipping under the very edge and lands with a quick jingle of her bracelets, catching there attention for a moment as she swiftly rolled past one twisting as he turned to face her and hurried on into the room, chasing Kenmore....(OOC: Still what do I see :)
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 tumble, you don't get any AoOs
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 26 >
<Merc> The room is messy. Bookcase is overturned near the door, papers all over the floor, there's a desk between you and Kenmore. You could jump over it to make it to him though he seems to be eyeing you. Looks like he was ready for your acrobatics stunts after your last sets of attacks and has a sword out, ready to strike you if you come close. (ooc - he readied an action on the off-chance that you make it past his goons. he's playing defensively)

* Maya smirks.  "You might be ready...but don't think you can come into Ferune and simply walk away after such.  Your sword against mine...do you really think you can catch my act?"  She leaped...but not toward him, toward the side bouncing off the wall and then again charging right against his back as she swung, the maneuver difficult to follow.
<Maya> OOC: Defensive stunt first, tumble.
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 for a +2 to ADB
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 25 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 removing his ADB
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 22 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 leaping
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 26 >
<Merc> roll d20+2 base attack check
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 16 >
<Merc> roll d20+2 base attack check #2
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 10 >
<Merc> Kenmore swings as he tries to skewer Maya before she can make her attack. "Dammit, woman, stop being such a pest!" he exclaims.
<Merc> roll d20+4
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 7 >
<Merc> ooc: wow, horrible luck, Kenmore.
<Maya> roll 1d20+6 come on...
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 9 >
<Merc> Perhaps there's too much acrobatics being involved as both simultaneous sword strikes fly through nothing but air.

<Merc> ooc - Jack

* Jack moves around Elise, and strikes at the other goon.
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 23 > THREAT = 19
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 24 > SUCCESS
<Merc> ooc - Max damage on the crit for roll of 20 on threat check.
* Jack sticks both blades under the mans rib cage from opposite ends
<Jack> roll 1d6+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Jack> roll 2d6
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 2 >
<Jack> roll 2d6
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 6 >
<Merc> The poor mook is obliterated as he's cut into at least four meaty pieces.

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > NPCs #6 > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2 > Anassia (8)'

<Merc> The two heavily injured mooks continue to make their way towards Aleph.
<Merc> roll d20
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 4 >
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 12 >
<Merc> roll 1d6
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 4 >
<Merc> One of the mooks falls under the trampling feet of the mob, crying out in pain as he's knocked unconscious. The other, however makes it to Aleph and takes a swing.

<Merc> roll d20+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 2 > FAILURE
<Merc> ooc: ....wow
<Merc> He skewers the wooden beam of the stand, his sword getting stuck on the beam giving Aleph an easy climbing route to the stand's roof if he still desires. Well, after he takes are of the sword's owner anyhow.

<Merc> ooc - Aleph

* Aleph thanks his stars before moving quickly...it'd be a risky prospect, but it'd be better to risk leaving an opening than to try fighting further in this riot...
* Aleph , with that, begins his climb toward the top of the stand
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 7 >
<Merc> The mook attempts to swing, but misses wildly as Aleph attempts to scamper up the sword, to the man's shock.
<Merc> ooc - roll a climb check. You get a +5 bonus from the sword.
<Aleph> roll 1d20+11 climb
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 21 >
<Merc> ooc - you make it up!

* Aleph scrambles to the top, quickly whirling on all fours before pulling out an arrow, whirling it as he places it on the draw, and then fires downward, point-blank at the surprised mook
<Aleph> roll 1d20+6 POWER OF SPINNING
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >
<Merc> ooc: the power of sniping fails!
<Aleph> ooc: this dicebot really hates me
<Merc> The arrow bounces off the mook's sword, and flies off into the air. It'll probably land somewhere, hopefully not on some poor townsperson's skull.

<Merc> The mob continues to panic, some of it heading the way of Elise and Jack now that there's an opening there. They part way around Anassia and the remaining mooks however. The injured mook however, finds himself being pushed in various directions by the riot around him.
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 3 >
<Merc> roll d6
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 5 >
<Merc> The poor bastard quickly becomes trampled under the feet of the running maniacs.
<Aleph> "...You know, I'm halfway tempted to let the people just trample these guys at this point..."

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2 > Anassia (8)'

<Merc> Two of the ignored mooks just continue to have fun slaughtering people, having somehow escaped the attention of the heroic do-gooders! A pair of children fall to their foul blades.

<Merc> Maya in the meantime, finds herself in dire trouble. While Kenmore isn't going anywhere...can Maya manuever around with all the opponents she faces now? "Kill her, fools!" Kenmore demands of his three goons.
<Merc> Two of the goons surround Maya and attack, the third standing protectively around Kenmore.
<Merc> roll d20+4
<Merc> roll d20+4
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 24 > SUCCESS
<Merc> roll d20+4 crit check
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 18 >
<Merc> roll d6+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 3 >
<Merc> roll 2d6+2
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 9 >

<Merc> The two goons dig their blades into Maya's sides, one of them slicing up a fair chunk of skin from her side, making Kenmore laugh, a dark look in his eyes. "Well, bitch...looks like all your acrobatics come back to haunt you, don't they?" he taunts as he tries to make his own attack.
<Merc> roll d20+3
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 5 >
<Merc> His own attack misses. How embarrassing.

<Merc> ooc - Elise. Mooks #5 are running up the stairs to second floor right now.

* Elise can hardly make out much detail on the situation with the crowd surging around her, and there's screaming *everywhere* by this point, so she can't exactly home in on the fighting that way...there were two goons back by the mayor's building the last time she saw it, so maybe she'll try to muscle through the crowd and see if any foes are still there.
<Elise> roll 1d20+5+2 (1/day bonus, Child of Faith--can't afford to get trampled now!)
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 26 >
<Merc> Elise easily makes it through the mob of people, making it to the door of the mayor's buildings.
<Jack> (damn, if only I could follow in her wake)
<Merc> ooc - actually, forgot, doors open, so you can keep moving in.
<Merc> Elise makes it inside the building, and starts to make her way inside.
* Elise proceeds into the building! She saw Maya attack the group's leader here, after all, so maybe the two of them are still fighting it out.

<Merc> Meanwhile, Cerisse and Skydale are fighting through with two of the remaining mooks. All four of them look injured, but still fighting it out.

<Merc> ooc - Anassia

* Anassia again concentrates on her power, funneling it into her palms yet again; thrice in a single day? Not what she was looking foward to for a festival...
<Anassia> roll 1d20+5 SUCCESS
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 25 >

<Anassia> Again she feels the power collect around her palms, launching it towards one of the murderers still standing.
<Anassia> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 10 >
<Merc> The magical energy misses, sadly.

*** ROUND 4 ***

* Topic is 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > NPCs #2 > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - Maya, go

* Maya is quick on her feet, twirling to strike at him and then withdraw down back hoping to find a corridor they have to fight one on one in.
<Maya> roll 1d20+5
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 19 >
<Maya> roll 3d6+6 I think I get to take him down
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 13 >

<Merc> ooc - You don't.
<Merc> Kenmore looks proud of himself as the goon that didn't attack Maya helps him block Maya's attack. "You were trying something, dear?"

<Maya> roll 1d20+12 dodge foes on escape
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 10 >
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 21 >
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >
<Merc> Though two of the goons seem dumbfounded as Maya attempts to jump her way out of trouble, one of them is not in any way affected and attempts to strike at her fleeing back.

<Merc> roll d20+4
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 19 >
<Merc> Maya's dancing ability keeps her clear from danger however.
<Merc> Maya starts to flee out of the office, and down the corridor? Stairs are off to the left, the head of one mook peeking as a pair approach, to the right are some other rooms.

* Maya moves toward them in a surprising motion and grabs onto the banister, using it instead to flip down to the next level of stairs in a fairly dangerous manuver.
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 jump check I think?
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 29 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 AoO blocking tumble
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 24 >
<Merc> Maya happens to land just behind the two surprised mook, her jumping off the wall and grabbing the banister for support keeping her from suffering damage from the fall down the stairs.

<Merc> ooc - Jack

* Jack attempts to weave and dodge through the crowd to the mayor's house
<Jack> roll 1d20+8
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >
<Merc> Jack barely manages to squeeze between spaces and make his way through. He' moving slower than Elise due to his weaving through instead of taking a straight path though.

<Merc> ooc - Aleph

* Aleph , lacking a reason to actually jump down into the rampaging mob, sights one of the mooks still not quite disabled, readies a shot, and fires one in turn, trying to focus on actually hitting...
<Aleph> roll 1d20+6 I'm going to have to start justifying misses ICly, aren't I?
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 12 >
<Merc> ooc - that actually hits, as he was not expecting a ranged attack.
<Aleph> roll 1d8+1 lol bow damage part II
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 8 >
<Merc> Cerisse looks momentarily surprised as an arrow goes through the neck of her injured opponent. His companion looks equally shocked at the sudden death.

<Aleph> 'No, Aleph, don't even bother to practice shooting things every now and then.  No, slack off and flip skirts.  No, nothing will ever happen here, ever.'

<Merc> The mob starts to thin as they make their way out through many of the open exits. Two of the mooks seem to be chasing behind the edge of some of the remaining mob, just hacking and slashing in a crazed fashion. (Seriously, these guys are just racking up kills.)

<Merc> Kenmore's goons looks conflicted about staying with Kenmore or moving on. Kenmore makes the decision for them. "You two, chase after that witch and break her legs. You, stick with me."

<Merc> The two goons nod as they head out after Maya, who is currently facing two mooks from above her. One of them can't really do much, with the guy behind him, but the other takes a swing at Maya.
<Merc> roll d20+2
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 6 >
<Merc> His swing misses completely though.

<Merc> ooc - Elise

* Elise hears the sound of fighting within the mayor's house and races inwards to find the source!

<Merc> With one of the mooks down, Cerisse and Skydale make quick work of the injured partner, Cerisse turning afterwards to look at the source of the arrow. Seeing Aleph, she grins and blows him a kiss in thanks, making Skydale scowl a bit.

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'

<Merc> ooc - Anassia

<Anassia> Anassia scowls again, changing her tactics as she notices the soldiers continuing to butcher.  Extending her hand towards the one without the arrow sticking out.  "Flee, knave, or you shall be utterly crushed!" she calls out, eyes flashing again at her exclamation, the wind swirling about herself yet again.
<Anassia> roll 1d20+11 [Browbeat, go!]
<Penuche> Anassia invokes Penuche's magic: < 21 >
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 3 >
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >
<Merc> Both of the mooks step back at the sight of Anassia's unnatural eyes. Having not seen Anassia's whiff attacks, they are promptly intimidated by the arcane sight and slowly start moving backwards.

*** ROUND 5 ***

* Topic is 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Mob > NPCs #4 > Goons > Kenmore > NPCs #5 > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - Maya

<Maya> "Break my legs?  Threatening my livelihood is more than your life is worth," She twirled, striking the nearby mook quickly and fading away down the stairs and back a bit so they'd have a harder time.
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 Tumble opposed by BaB for Tumble Attack.
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 30 >
<Maya> roll 1d20+5 to hit against 10.
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >
<Merc> roll d20+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 9 >
<Maya> roll 3d6+6 dead mook
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Merc> Mook's guts shower his partner as Maya fades down the stairs.

<Merc> ooc - Jack, just chasing after Elise?
<Jack> (yeah)
* Jack shouts while running "Aleph, nail those two fucking pricks!"

<Merc> ooc - Aleph then

<Aleph> "Yeah, you don't need to tell me that twice!"
* Aleph with that, fires a shot toward one of the mooks senselessly butchering civilians for...the sake of butchering civilians...
<Aleph> Or perhaps for the sake of following orders.  It's hard to tell with these guys.
<Aleph> roll 1d20+5
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 10 >
<Merc> Aleph misses with his shot, unfortunately, but the arrow seems to finish off the intimidation tactic Anassia started as they drop their weapons and flee. The plaza is mostly empty now as most of the townsfolks have stampeded out. One lone mook and two goons trail behind Maya.
<Aleph> 'No, Aleph.  Drink all damn night long.  Of COURSE you end up sucking the one day you actually need to be good...'

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Goons > Kenmore > NPC #5 > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'

<Merc> ooc - Elise go. You can meet up with Maya.

* Elise follows the sound of an evil man suffering a horrible death--and finds the exotic dancer responsible for the carnage? Surprising.
<Maya> "That beast is up ahead," Maya pointed, catching her breath a moment.  "He's surrounded with his guards."
<Elise> "Then we'll just have to knock them down!" Elise says, marching onwards until she's found someone else to hit.
<Merc> Elise finds herself facing a mook, surprised at the unknown face, ready to have his brain smashed in!

<Merc> ooc - Anassia. There' no mooks left in the plaza.

* Anassia glances around the plaza quickly looking for a sign of more of the mooks and, finding none, runs toward Jack. "This is horrible," she says simply, looking towards the building, eyes still blood-red in color.

*** ROUND 6 ***

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Goons > Kenmore > NPC #5 > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - maya and jack!
<Merc> ooc - actually...before I forget
<Merc> roll d20
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 2 >

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Goons > Kenmore > NPC #5 > Elise (14) > Anassia (8) > ???'

* Maya hurries after Elise, leaping clear over her head as she catches up and striking down the mook on the stairs to clear the way for her.
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 jump....go high
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
* Maya jumps...to her side yes...
<Maya> roll 1d20+5 mook slaying
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 24 >
<Maya> roll 3d6+6 boom, mook gone, elise go hurt the big bad
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >
<Merc> The mook bleeds as his corpse limply falls towards Elise, drenching her in his blood.

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Goons > Kenmore > Elise (14) > Anassia (8) > ???'

<Merc> ooc - Jack, you can reach them, you'll have spotted Maya just as she started running. No goons to fight within reach yet though.
<Jack> (assume I catch up with them then)
<Jack> "What're we facing?"

<Merc> ooc - Aleph

<Aleph> '...like hell I'm going to stand here looking useless...nevermind that the stairs are already crowded beyond reason, I bet...' With that thought, Aleph makes what he feels may be the dumbest choice in his life...
<Aleph> ...and tries to run and jump up to the balcony.

<Aleph> roll 1d20+6 oh dear god please work or I will be the first to mess with your programming, bot, and I AM NOT TRAINED IN WHATEVER YOU ARE PROGRAMMED IN MOST LIKELY!!!
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 7 > FAILURE
<Merc> ooc: hahahahaha
<Merc> ooc: roll 1d6 falling damage.
<Merc> ooc: actually, roll a reflex to grab hold of something
<Merc> ooc: and not take that damage.
<Aleph> roll 1d20+5 FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WORK
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 18 >
<Merc> Aleph attempts to jump towards the balcony, but he trips over his shoelaces as he's making the jump! Luckily, he grabs hold of the edge of the stand's roof as he starts to fall, softening the fall so the only thing that's hurt is his pride, as he hangs off the edge.

<Merc> Inside, two goons spot three of the annoying do-gooders that ruined Kenmore's plans so horribly. They even ruined their planned surprises! Bastards! They both charge towards the females respectively.
<Merc> roll d20+2
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Merc> roll d20+2
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 3 >
<Merc> roll d6+1
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 3 >
<Merc> Maya gets struck, though it's just a bit of a flesh wound. Elise meanwhile, just gets a bit of air hitting her in the face as the sword whiffs past.

<Merc> ooc - Elise

<Elise> "You couldn't stop me with...with...the biggest sword in the world!" Elise shouts as she strikes back at her attacker.
<Elise> roll 1d20+7
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 27 > SUCCESS
<Elise> roll 1d20+7 crit check
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Merc> ooc: crit
<Elise> roll 6d6+21 oh god he is so dead
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 40 >
<Merc> Oh god, how horrible. Elise's weapon just hammers him like a nail deep into the ground, his body deforming as blood leaks through his pores and his bones are horribly squashed in a vertical direction.

<Merc> ooc - Anassia, you can just reach them on your turn. You can chat if you'd like.
<Merc> ooc - Resolving ???

<Merc> As Anassia reaches the group, and the remaining goon trembles at what just happened to his partner, a loudbellowing horn rings out from outside. "FINALLY!" they can hear Kenmore screaming.
<Jack> "Oh fuck."
<Jack> "Not good, not good."
<Jack> "C'mon Maya, let's go take care of these fuckers."

*** ROUND 7 ***

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Goons > Kenmore > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - Maya's and Jack's turn

<Maya> "Take care of this guy," Maya didn't like what she was hearing as she shifted past him and hurried to see what was going on ahead.
<Maya> roll 1d20+12 to just simply dodge past him.
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 29 >

* Jack sticks the bastard
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Jack> roll 1d20+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 18 >
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 18 >
<Merc> ooc: hit hit
<Jack> roll 3d6+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 13 >
<Jack> roll 3d6+4
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 16 >

<Merc> The man is ripped to shreds as Maya reaches the room again, seeing Kenmore approaching the balcony again, his guard standing right besides him looking for trouble, and immediately making noise at the sight of Maya. "You again? Damn, but you're a persistent broad..." Kenmore mutters as he takes a look back. "Well, sorry to say, but this dance, is as we say...over."

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Single Goon > Kenmore > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'

<Merc> ooc - Aleph

<Aleph> 'Climb oh dear god climb and get in the room it's better than whatever the hell is going on out there
<Aleph> ...and it's embarassing.'
<Aleph> roll 1d20+6 climb
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
<Merc> Aleph quickly scampers back up the roof.
<Aleph> ...and then get in the room.
<Aleph> roll 1d20+6 jump attempt or I get an attack against you as a free action
<Penuche> Aleph invokes Penuche's magic: < 17 >

<Merc> Aleph makes it to the balcony, surprising Kenmore. "Oh for crying out loud, do they breed monkeys in this town or something?" he groans out. "You take care of her, I'll deal with this monkey."
<Aleph> "Please.  At least get it right.  I grew up in this town, I wasn't BORN here."

<Merc> The goon rushes at Maya, screaming as he swings.
<Merc> roll d20+2
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 7 >

<Merc> He misses. How pathetic. Kenmore meanwhile rolls his eyes at Aleph. "Yeah, well you'll die here, kid. Now outta my way," he states as he rushes towards the balcony...and jumps past the archer. "This is gonna hurt..." he mutters as he makes his jump, aiming for a stall's roof to minimize his damage.

<Merc> roll 1d6 minimized falling damage
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 4 >
<Merc> roll d20+4 reflex
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 9 >
<Merc> roll 1d6
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 6 >

<Merc> Kenmore bounces off a stand's roof, and rolls. He attempts to grab onto the edge, but misses as he makes a rough laning on the ground below. "Owww..." he mutters.

<Merc> ooc - Elise

* Elise races up the stairs to finish off whatever scum is left. "*I* was born in this town, and I won't listen to anyone insult it!"
<Elise> roll 1d20+7
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 18 >
<Merc> ooc - hit
<Elise> roll 2d6+7
<Penuche> Elise invokes Penuche's magic: < 15 >
<Merc> The goon crumbles under the attack. He still seems to be breathing though he's definitely out of the fight.

* Merc changes topic to 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Kenmore > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'

<Maya> "He's heading back downstairs, he's going to leap for it."

<Merc> ooc - Anassia

* Anassia hears Maya's call, frowning, before running back out the front door, looking for the escapee. Move action, yo.

*** ROUND 8 ***

* Topic is 'Maya = Jack (23) > Aleph (20) > Kenmore > Elise (14) > Anassia (8)'
<Merc> ooc - Maya/Jack then

<Jack> "Shit!"
<Aleph> "...More like he already did."
<Aleph> "...badly."
* Maya rushes after him, "You're not getting away after this!"

<Maya> roll 1d20+12 no terrain penalties
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 14 >
<Maya> OOC: 10 feet, enough to get through the room
<Maya> roll 1d20+13 leap bounce down.
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 21 >
<Maya> OOC: also vertical slice.  BaB challenge on that.
<Maya> OOC: Trying to eliminate his ADB
<Maya> roll 1d20+6
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 24 >
<Merc> roll d20+2 base attack check
<Penuche> Merc invokes Penuche's magic: < 19 >
<Merc> ooc: roll your damage
<Maya> roll 3d6+6
<Maya> "We don't take well to murdering brigands here!" she shouts as she flies down the air, slicing through the air.
<Penuche> Maya invokes Penuche's magic: < 16 >
<Jack> roll 1d20+8 tumble
<Penuche> Jack invokes Penuche's magic: < 11 >

<Merc> "...bitch." he mutters as he falls to his knees and dies.

<Merc> ooc - free actions.

*** END COMBAT ***

<Merc> --- ooc ---
<Cidward> God willing, we'll all meet in Buttquest 2: The Quest for More Butts.