Kaoru

[Carthrat]

Sunlight filtered in through the windows of the Kamiya Dojo, shining upon a sleeping figure in a futon.

Closer inspection revealed the figure was none other than Kamiya Kaoru. Looking at her eyes, one could see that they had turned red from crying... crying all night.

Haunted thoughts were running through her head as she slept. Kenshin.. had left for Kyoto. He'll probably return as a hitokiri again...if at all. Why? Why did he have to go?

She had cried in her sleep that night. Tears stained her face.

But certain events were unfolding... that could prevent her from ever seeing Kenshin again. Even if things went as destiny planned...

A wrenching in her mind. She screamed mentally... and then she was gone.

Replaced with her was a certain individual, who felt strangely folorn as he woke... to an unfamiliar celing.

[Bean Bandit]

Bean woke up slowly, his eyes shut against the emerging sun. He felt oddly depressed, for some reason... as if he'd just lost something very important to him. But he wasn't sure what it was.

He WAS sure waking up feeling lost and miserable was not fun.

He reached up a hand to rub his eyes wearily.

Tears? I've been CRYING?

That was when he caught sight of the hand he used to rub his eyes with. It was smaller than he was used to...and the callouses were in different places.

Wha-? Wait...sunlight? I live in a basement apartment!

He glanced up, looking at the unfamiliar surroundings. It was a simple, but tidy room, brightly lit through the windows, with a decidely Japanese look to it.

Definitely NOT the messy, dark apartment he was used to.

He slowly pulled himself into a sitting position, looking around, confused beyond belief. It was while he was looking around that he felt an unusual weight on his head.

It wasn't immensely heavy. Quite light, actually...but it was out of the ordinary. He reached back and pulled it over his shoulder, his eyes widening in disbelief. His short, blond hair had somehow grown into long, jet black hair, pulled into a loose braid.

That was when he saw it. His eyes dropped from the braid over his shoulder, down the front of the sleeping robe he was wearing that had fallen slightly open when he sat up.

And he realized...he wasn't a 'he' anymore.

WHAT THE HELL????

[Bean Bandit]

Bean stared down the front of his slightly parted robe, at the slightly hidden patch of white skin, and the general shape beneath the area covered by the robe, implying entirely unmasculine contours to his chest.

He couldn't see all of what he now knew was there...but he could see enough.

I'm...I'm a girl. How is that POSSIBLE???

He raised his hand to his face, and felt no evidence of the normal rough skin, and beginnings of a beard. Instead, his smaller fingers tracer over his cheek, encountering nothing but smooth and slightly damp skin.

His mind shied away from the exploration of the change for the moment, and returned to the original cause for concern.

Crying...I've been crying. Why? he stopped for a moment. A heavy feeling weighed down on his chest, like a literal ache, making him feel as through he were going to start crying...again. While we're at it...why am I feeling so miserable?

[Carthrat]

One hour later...

Bean had been lying motionless for a little over an hour, just pondering his fate.

Fate took a had in the future, once more...

The door to Kaoru's room slid open, revealing Tsubame and Tae standing there, worried expressions on their face.

"Kaoru-chan... are you ok? We brought you some food... Yahiko says you havn't eaten in two days... everyones worried. Even Sanosuke, and you KNOW how he is.."

Tsubame timidly walked forward with a tray of food and knelt down beside Kaoru.

"Please eat..."

[Bean Bandit]

Bean willed himself not to react as the woman and the young girl entered the room, simply staring at the wall.

After they'd spoken, he was struck by a sense of revelation. Yahiko? Sanosuke? No WAY! I...I know this. I know what's going on!

Unfortuantely...the ache in his chest didn't let up at the discovery. In fact...if it were possible...it increased.

He rolled over on the futon, and faced away from Tsubame, before she could see that his eyes were beginning to fill with tears.

What's wrong with me?! he thought in frustrated despair, despite the sneaking sensation that he already knew.

"I'm not hungry," he said softly.

[Carthrat]

"Kaoru-chan... you have to eat. Please.."

Tsubame knelt down and placed the food next to Kaoru.

"Tsubame made this herself, Kaoru.. it's very good. Please eat it.."

[Bean Bandit]

"I don't...I don't want anything." Bean managed.

This much, at least was true. The moment the pieces had come together in his mind, his stomach rebelled at the thought of eating.

How on earth did this happen? What do I do now??

[Carthrat]

Kaoru didn't have any time to think, as another figure showed itself.

"My god. You're still here. I thought you'd have left already."

Megumi Takani walked inside and stared down contemptously at Kaoru.

"How pathetic."

[Bean Bandit]

Bean pulled himself into a sitting postion, and looked up at Megumi, his expression of nervous depression being pushed aside by irritation.

He glared up at Megumi, resisting the urge to wipe his eyes again, well aware that they were dark from lack of sleep. Well...I've got to be Kaoru until I figure out what's going on, and what's happening to me...at least this part will be natural.

"What do you want, Megumi-san?"

[Bean Bandit]

"Well, I just wanted to look upon the poor woman Ken-san left behind. A-hahahahahaha!"

Why that bitch...Wait...I remember this line. Bean's eyes narrowed. "He left you, too."

"Don't compare me to someone who justs sits there. All you've done is lie in bed and cried about this." Megumi replied tartly.

Bean flushed a little at the all-too-accurate barb, and bowed his head, staring at the robe he wore, and the unfamiliar body. "What I've done...Is none of your business" he muttered quietly.

"None of my business, is it?" replied Megumi, looking more than a little annoyed. "Well, I've no time to spend here, then."

She withdrew a small case from the sleeve of her kimono. "This is an old family remedy passed down through my family for generations. Ken-san told me that it was very effective. I was going to ask you to give it to him, but I'll have to give it to Yahiko-kun instead, because all you seem to do is cry. When Ken-san gets this, I'm sure he'll think of me, and forget all about the raccoon girl."

Bean's glare grew hot. "You don't know anything about the way I feel! How it felt..."

Wha-? Where did that come from?

"How it felt? How it felt to have him leave you? Kaoru, I know better than you think I do."

Bean winced internally. Can't falter now. Just...remember the episode. What happened when he left...? As he reacalled the farewell episode of the anime, A flood of unfamiliar emotion filled him, (Her?) spurring her words.

"How could you know what it's like to be told good-bye? You have no idea what it was like!"

A lone tear graced Megumi's face. "Perhaps.. but you have no idea what's it's like to be left without even a goodbye.."

Bean, still trying to arrange her emotion tangled thoughts, was caught by surprise, even though she'd expected the line.

He calmed somewhat, and felt a sudden surge of irrational shame. He allowed stress to run away with him, and he was repeating Kaoru's mistakes...Shouldn't he be trying to FIX them? "Megumi-san..."

"You should think before you speak," finished Megumi, walking away silently.

[Bean Bandit]

Bean's head began to throb. I...Oh god, what's happening to me?

"I...I've got to...Excuse me...I'm sorry!" he blurted to Tae and Tsubame.

He rolled to his feet, tossing the comforter aside. Feeling weak and unco-ordinated, he half staggered, half ran from the room, his head spinning....

[Bean Bandit]

Bean stumbled out into the fresh air, his mind racing. He quickly made his way over the wooden porch, stopping briefly to lean against a wooden pillar.

Geez...so weak...I...I mean, SHE really hasn't eaten in two days...

As he slumped against the pillar, the long black braid slipped over his shoulder, into his field of vision. He flinched, then pushed himself upright, and stepped into the sunlight.

Nearly by themselves, his feet led him into the large structure, seperate from the house.

He opened the door and stepped inside, looking around in tired amazement, his mind still whirling. Kamiya Dojo...My dojo...? I can't believe this is happening...

[Bean Bandit]

Bean walked slowly and carefully over the length of the dojo, leaning on the wall for support. The loose yukata he wore swishing against his bare legs as he walked, reminding him with every step that things were different.

This...is a dream? No. No, It can't be. I can feel I'm hungry...and weak...And so damned SAD...

He paused, his face going red momentarily.

And I can feel my...Kaoru's chest..shifting. Why Kaoru? Hell, even Yahiko would be better than this... And I just fell into the role...I didn't even deal with Megumi differently...

He reached over to one of the wall racks, and carefully removed a bokken. It felt oddly large sitting in his now-smaller hands...but comfortable, as well.

Just like before, at home. I know how to use these...can I still do it? My life may depend on this... The books and practice came to him in a rush of memory, and he slowly executed a sword kata.

To his surprise, despite it's weakened state...his new body responded with speed and precision, reflexes even filling in moves, helping him string them together...

He finished the kata...and dropped to his knees, slumping against the wall, breathing heavily as the bokken clattered from his hand down to the poilished wooden floor.

I guess that can be expected of the body of an assistant master of a dojo...felt like I wasn't tapping all of the potential, though. Maybe being Kaoru will teach me something?

What do I do about this situation? Do I go with it? Do I WANT to see..'him'? I feel like this now...And If I see him...how much of my identity gets lost to Kaoru's?

With that troubling thought...Bean let out a long shuddering gasp, weak from exertion, and lack of food.

[Carthrat]

Kaoru's moping was interrupted by Yahiko, who had a rather annoyed expression on his face.

"Kaoru-baka! We're going now! Get food, get dressed, and get out!"

[Bean Bandit]

Bean looked up at the boy, and grimaced in irritation. I changed things. I wasn't supposed to leave the room. Is that good? Or bad?

Do I go with him? As Kaoru? What do I do when we see...Kenshin?

He was unable to repress a shiver as he finally thought the name. After a moment, Bean bowed his head in frustration, the midnight black hair obscuring his vision He struggled to his feet, once again noticing how...Off...everything felt.

I have no idea...

"Don't make it sound so easy, Yahiko-CHAN," he ground out, internally cursing the less than intimidating, feminine voice of the woman he'd become.

He took a deep breath, and released it. "What makes you think he'll be happy too see us when we get there?" He asked the boy standing in the door to the dojo, hesitantly.