[Haruhi (novels)] [strong citrine flavoring] Apology

[Brian]

Something pointless, but hopefully worth sharing.

After being depressed for nearly three straight years, I finally found the will to write again; I expect I'm quite rusty.


Anyway, this is set in the light novel "the Sigh of Suzumiya Haruhi", or anime season 2, the second-to-last episode of "the Sigh of Suzumiya Haruhi".  If you want to know the only real difference (because it is somewhat relevant for this fic, but honestly not very), here is your spoiler:

Spoiler: ShowHide

The biggest significant difference between the two (novel and anime) is that in the novel, the Brigade got drunk twice on the island adventure, before Haruhi decided she didn't like hangovers and banned alcohol from the brigade forevermore.

Also, unrelated: <3 to the spoiler tag!  Much <3!

[Dracos]

Glad you like the spoiler tag :)

[Brian]

Glad you like the spoiler tag :)

Indeed.  I'm pondering going way overboard and finding an anime character to say represents it, which we can call "Spoiler-tan".

It'll be tragic awesome.

[Edward]

     The Apology
>
>     A 'Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi' fanfiction.
>
>     Note: Takes place during 'Sigh' as I attempt to sort out my own
>squicks with Kyon and Haruhi's ... discussion ... over a drunk
>Mikuru.

I find Haruhi's treatment of Mikiru in general to be disquieting. And Kyon's general lack of trying to stop it.

>This is now entirely from the light novels instead of the
>anime (though I swiped hair colors, just to annoy old school anime
>vs. manga Ranma purists.  Lawl).

Heh.

>     But it wasn't anything like I always dreamed when watching
>those anime, and I may be doing everyone a disservice by calling
>myself the hero of this story.  Those scenes always feature giant
>robots, cataclysmic world-destrying devices, weapons that anhilate

"world-destroying" "annihilate"

>     So, still fuming, I listened to Tsuruya's apology, not feeling
>it and barely hearing it.  Apologizing with that smile and giggle?

Did anyone else apologize?

>     At any rate, this clandenstine meeting will be where Tsuruya
>tells me that she's a slider, or a vampire, or a member of a Yakuza
>family (though, I somewhat expect that, really)....

"clandestine"

My personal view is that Tsuruya lives in a tiger-striped spaceship.

>Something that would suit Suzumiya's demented fantasies.

If it's really Haruhi that has the power.

>     I turned away from the entrance, still carrying the extra
>filming equipment except for the camera that Suzumiya kept.

Suggest *film* equipment.

>     How did she know, I wonder?

Nonsense, she's a perfectly normal teenager, just like the rest of the cast. :p

> Then she turns to me with bright eyes and a
>huge grin.  "Was it the limo that was supicious?"

"suspicious"

>
>     "No," I say tiredly.  My anger is still there, but dim and out
>of reach, like a pressure behind my eyeballs waiting to intensify on
>queue and turn my vision red again.

"intensify on *cue*"


>     Perhaps it is my doom to be manipulated by women my entire
>life.  If I anger Suzumiya and dissasociate myself with the SOS
>Brigade, does that make me subject to Tsuruya's will?

"disassociate"

> No, I've been
>pushed and manipulated enough today.

Suggest dropping "pushed and"

>     Even though this maid must be in her twenties, obviously older
>than us, she is subject to the whims of Tsuruya.  "I will show you
>to the bath," she says demurely, turning around and leading the way.

It seems to me that if Tsuruya's goal is to make Kyon relax, this highly formal setting is counter-productive.

>Truth be told,
>despite my protestations and irritations, and my true resentment of
>feeling I have no real power of choice in the matter, washing myself
>vigoriously with cold water does cool my temper a bit.

"vigorously"

>It occurs to me that this is where Tsuruya bathes every day, and
>Asahina herself, just earlier today before....

Too bad he left the film equipment with Koizumi. ;)

>So that's how it's done?  I feel a bit embarassed.
>"I'm sorry to be so problematic for you."

"embarrassed"

>She is a sempai, regardless of my feelings on the matter, so that
>doesn't aggrivate me as much as 'san'.  Though, I'm being petty.

"aggravate"

>It's hot, and oddly bitter, but not bad.

If Kyon is mad because the others got Mikiru drunk, this doesn't seem to be the best thing to do.

>     I feel oddly ambivelant.

"ambivalent"

>     "Well," I say, thinking.  There was that one time, but I
>shouldn't mention it to Tsuruya.  She still hasn't told me what kind
>of non-human person she is yet.

Heh.

>     I blink in confusion.  "What?"
>
>     "She wants you to forgive her."

Nice.

>Because there is no image of Haruhi apologizing, when she's
>upset and embarassed, and realizes she's stepped over a line, she
>acts angry instead of sorry.

"embarrassed"

>     "No, I gave your liqour for another reason entirely," she says
>with bright cheer.

"liquor"

>     It takes a long time for words to come to my mouth, and it's a
>bit of a strugle, but finally I say, "You're not serious."

"struggle"

>But I'm not someone else, and while I am lightheaded, my
>control overmyself isn't totally gone.  In any case, this is just
>too much for my conflicted heart right now.

Missing space between "over" and "myself"

>She shifts one leg against me, and I squirm in embarassment.

"embarrassment"

> Short term, as likable as Tsuruya-
>sempai is, she is completely insane.
>
>     I mean that in the nicest way possible.  I really do.

Heh.

>"Of course, I can't do this with anyone else
>except for you, Mikuru-chan, and Haru-nyan, so I may demand payment
>once in a while!"

The average anime boy should be hemorrhaging to death from the images this conjures.

>     "Er, okay," I manage, somewhat dazed.

Heh.

>     "Calcium deficiency," I decide after a moment, smiling weakly.
>"I drank almost a whole liter of milk; I'm positive I will feel feel
>better in the morning."

Recommend dropping one "feel".

Good to see you writing again.

[Brian]

>     Note: Takes place during 'Sigh' as I attempt to sort out my own
>squicks with Kyon and Haruhi's ... discussion ... over a drunk
>Mikuru.

I find Haruhi's treatment of Mikiru in general to be disquieting. And Kyon's general lack of trying to stop it.

You don't see it as much in the anime, but in the novels, Haruhi actually gets much better about it.  I'd like to say that Kyon was better there, but in all honesty he's actually a bit worse -- he's told by Haruhi what the plan to extort the computer from the computer club is ahead of time (by a few seconds).  Unfortunately, Mikuru totally misunderstands Kyon's signal that she should run away, but he still takes the pictures for Haruhi once everything is done.

Then again, every time Kyon actually tries to stand up for Mikuru against Haruhi, Mikuru begs him not to.  Even when she's drunk:

Code Select Expand

"You can't! You mustn't fight..."
Standing between me and Haruhi, Asahina-san slumped to the ground with her face all red. She
grabbed Haruhi's knees and said,
"Um... Please get along well with each other... or... we'll be..."

>robots, cataclysmic world-destrying devices, weapons that anhilate

"world-destroying" "annihilate"

Used all of your spelling corrections.

>     So, still fuming, I listened to Tsuruya's apology, not feeling
>it and barely hearing it.  Apologizing with that smile and giggle?
Did anyone else apologize?

Nope!  Not a one.  Nagato leaves without a word, Haruhi stays behind with the camera (and unconscious Mikuru) at Tsuruya's place, where the scene was shot.  Koizumi actually admonishes Kyon at length for it and tells him to apologize to Haruhi.  I wanted to see an esper get punched. -_-

Of course, the missing context is that after Haruhi hit Mikuru on the back of the head (several times) to try and knock the contact lens out of Mikuru's eye while she was drunk, Kyon finally snapped and moved to hit _Haruhi_ (being stopped by Koizumi).  Interestingly, every summary of that scene I've ever read says 'fortunately' Kyon was stopped.

And yeah, that really bothered me.  Haruhi's most extended kick-the-dog moment.  Technically, the molestation in the first book is actually worse, but it's played comically (though, in retrospect, it's not that funny, considering).  In any case, we can empathize somewhat with our narrator who doesn't get bent out of shape over the blackmail scheme, but DOES prevent Haruhi from groping beneath Mikuru's skirt (which she tried).

However, when he stops telling us there's anything remotely good about the girl he wanted to hit, we tend to agree....  The anime scene was actually much more sympathetic to Haruhi; she was on the verge of tears seeing how angry Kyon was, and was only hitting Mikuru over the head with a foam cone.

Aaaaaanyway.  Haruhi does quite a bit to redeem herself in later stories, the unspoken implication being that she's terrified of really pissing Kyon off like that again.  Even so, it bothered me. >_>

My personal view is that Tsuruya lives in a tiger-striped spaceship.

Well, she lives in a mansion, and her family owns most of the land outside of the city. >_>;;

Still, that'd be an amusing stand-in....

>Something that would suit Suzumiya's demented fantasies.

If it's really Haruhi that has the power.

In the novels, Koizumi remarks several times that Kyon is at least as important as Haruhi, saying they're analogous to the king and queen on a chess-board.  Later novels....  Well, that's massive spoiler territory. <.<

>filming equipment except for the camera that Suzumiya kept.

Suggest *film* equipment.

Just going to pare it down to 'equipment'.

>     How did she know, I wonder?

Nonsense, she's a perfectly normal teenager, just like the rest of the cast. :p

She even says so herself!  She tells Kyon they have the same smell, unlike the rest of the SOS Brigade.

> No, I've been
>pushed and manipulated enough today.

Suggest dropping "pushed and"

Alright, sounds good.

It seems to me that if Tsuruya's goal is to make Kyon relax, this highly formal setting is counter-productive.

Tsuruya: True!  Hey, it'll be casual if I help you wash, right?  Let's take the bath together!
Kyon: I'm pretty sure you don't make a blatant offer like that until book 7.
Tsuruya: What's wrong with moving the timetable forward?
Kyon: You also offered to include Mikuru, but I don't see her here.
Tsuruya: Easily fixed!
Kyon: Perhaps so, but now we're a long way from 'relaxed'.

Too bad he left the film equipment with Koizumi. ;)

Haruhi specifically had the camera.

>It's hot, and oddly bitter, but not bad.
If Kyon is mad because the others got Mikiru drunk, this doesn't seem to be the best thing to do.

Tsuruya: What's the worst that could happen?
Kyon: I could be a violent drunk?
Tsuruya: Yeah, but the fic wasn't labeled AU, and we know in canon you're a harmless lush when you drink!
Kyon: YOU don't know that.
Tsuruya: Can you prove that?
Kyon: ....

Yeah, generally, it would be a bad idea.  But this is Tsuruya. >.>

>     "Well," I say, thinking.  There was that one time, but I
>shouldn't mention it to Tsuruya.  She still hasn't told me what kind
>of non-human person she is yet.

Heh.

Fanfic likes to make her the slider.

>     I blink in confusion.  "What?"
>
>     "She wants you to forgive her."

Nice.

This is never clear in canon, except after a few re-reads to see the hints ... or in the anime, I suppose.

> Short term, as likable as Tsuruya-
>sempai is, she is completely insane.
>
>     I mean that in the nicest way possible.  I really do.

Heh.

My favorite bit in the entire fic. <.<

>"Of course, I can't do this with anyone else
>except for you, Mikuru-chan, and Haru-nyan, so I may demand payment
>once in a while!"

The average anime boy should be hemorrhaging to death from the images this conjures.

Kyon: While I agree, I assure you, I'm a perfectly ordinary, normal person.
Tsuruya: Who almost never gets upset about anything?
Kyon: That's a normal trait.  I lost my temper at the guy who almost ran over the kid I saved, right?
Mikuru: While you're mentioning that, who is more conscientious about time-travel than a supposed professional time-traveler?
Kyon: Er, uh, any normal person would take care if they weren't used to time travel!
Yuki: Who blackmailed the Integrated Data Sentience Entity?
Kyon: Um....  Well....  You see....  That was a fluke!  Yeah!  I got lucky, is all!
Shamisen: I believe you're in denial.  Surely you can't believe that you're _just_ a normal person, even if you only look to the company you keep?
Kyon: Uh....  That is....   Oh!  Arguments from talking cats are invalid.  You're too strange to judge me.
Kimidori Emiri: Who's able to read the true emotions of not one, but almost every humanoid interface they see?
Kyon: I'M NOT LISTENING!
Koizumi: What about that time when we were stuck in the endlessly repeating August, until-
Kyon: LA-LA-LA, NORMAL PERSON IGNORING CRAZY-TALK HERE, LA-LA-LA!

Recommend dropping one "feel".

Oops!  Done. :)

Good to see you writing again.

Thanks again for taking the time to comment, and I'm sorry about the extended vanishment. >_>;

[Edward]

In the novels, Koizumi remarks several times that Kyon is at least as important as Haruhi, saying they're analogous to the king and queen on a chess-board.  Later novels....  Well, that's massive spoiler territory. <.<

Interesting.

>     How did she know, I wonder?

Nonsense, she's a perfectly normal teenager, just like the rest of the cast. :p

She even says so herself!  She tells Kyon they have the same smell, unlike the rest of the SOS Brigade.

Considering what I think Kyon is, that has some implications.

It seems to me that if Tsuruya's goal is to make Kyon relax, this highly formal setting is counter-productive.

Tsuruya: True!  Hey, it'll be casual if I help you wash, right?  Let's take the bath together!
Kyon: I'm pretty sure you don't make a blatant offer like that until book 7.
Tsuruya: What's wrong with moving the timetable forward?
Kyon: You also offered to include Mikuru, but I don't see her here.
Tsuruya: Easily fixed!
Kyon: Perhaps so, but now we're a long way from 'relaxed'.

Tsuruya: That's the destination, this is the journey.

Fanfic likes to make her the slider.

That could explain her being friends with the time traveler.